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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/Xaytam on 2024-01-23 18:18:26+00:00.
Veganism is the only problem in my relationship
I am a 20-year-old young man with a 20-year-old girlfriend who is vegan, and after a year of dating I am very happy with our life but I am not vegan and sometimes veganism affects our relationship. We are both foreign students in Germany and there are many vegan options to choose from in restaurants and supermarkets here (compared to my home country). My girlfriend is going to be vegan for 4 years and veganism is a big part of her life, she has many books on veganism, an Instagram page of her vegan recipes, a virtual store of vegan sweets and she is even studying in one of the best universities at Germany Nutrition, so believe me when I tell you that she is not a typical person pretending to be vegan. Luckily I'm not a big fan of meat (except fish but here in Germany it's expensive) and I love salads, plus my girlfriend cooks very well so the food doesn't exactly bother as much when eating at home. The problem with all this is that I am not vegan, I understand their way of life and way of doing things but I have lived a totally different life but I cannot force myself to be something that I know I am not, and this girl is vegan but she is also an excellent person and above all she is very empathic so she is not going to force me to veganism or anything, even every time we talk about the subject it is me asking her about veganism because of my curiosity but she has never criticized me because of what many say " eat corpses." I had a previous relationship of 4 years in my adolescence and in this year with her I have lived, I have loved and experienced so many unimaginable things that I really feel that she is the person I want in my life forever, but I am not vegan and maybe I never will be. And This has created problems for both of us, because sometimes we go out to visit a city and the restaurants are either all vegan (I'm not a big fan of the food) or not at all vegan and she has to eat tomato soup or rice with tofu or she brings a Taper with her food done. I really love going out to eat and connecting especially in my native country, so I have doubts that it could happen the moment she comes to my country or if I continue with her and we move in together (we are planning that) I will feel guilty cooking meat always on his face, knowing that it makes her feel bad, and I also know that she has a dream of having a vegan cafe where she can serve vegan cakes and sweets. Wouldn't I be an obstacle for her to continue her vegan life? She has always been compromised to veganism and I don't want her love for me to blind her and forget these dreams. Or if her clients find out that her partner is not vegan and me at her house cooks meat, wouldn't they try to cancel her? or other vegan friends she may make in the future will not they criticize her just because I am not vegan?
I love her and this relationship is all i have in this foreign country, but i am afraid it will not work.
And yes I've tried to become vegan but a big part of my life is the food and to cook, my family memories are eating and cooking. I would love to present her to my family and all eat together deliceuos food made by me and my dad. But sadly it seems that will never happen and the worst part its that is nobody foult maybe mine idk.
My english is very bad btw She speaks portuguese, I speak spanish, the world around me is in german so i confuse the languages a little bit
Td;lr: I have problems in my relationship due to veganism and dont know how to react to them