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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/CroissantLizard on 2024-01-23 14:24:26+00:00.
I (24F) have graduated last year, on a gap year and planning to do my postgraduates next year. I only have a driving license back home. I wanted to get one here but for multiple reasons, right now I can’t get a car.
My boyfriend (24M) didn’t go to Uni and has been working full time since 18, so he managed to get a car last year. At first he used to take me places and even offer to do it. Ever since we moved in together, he’s been refusing even taking me to do the weekly grocery shopping. I do the shopping for 3 people household and it’s heavy. Whenever we go somewhere he refuses to drive and tell me to book an Uber (I always pay for the Uber eventhough it’s for both of us). Sometimes it’s understandable due to parking but sometimes that’s not even the issue.
Now I financially help him a lot, the groceries are mostly paid by me. I lent him money whenever he needed and frankly never asked for it back. I do most of the house chores even his laundry. I always paid for parking when he took me places. To me personally driving is such low effort??
Today I got super ill and asked if he could grab me some food and warm drink after work and that I’d pay him back. He said yes at first but then said he was tired and I should get delivery. For him it would’ve been a drive thru, but a delivery not only costs more, but I have to go downstairs to collect it, and meet the driver looking like an absolute mess. Obviously it’s a favour and I can’t be upset, but i can’t help but feel really hurt that he wouldn’t help me with the one thing he can do that I can’t do, especially with everything I do for him.
Tl;dr: my boyfriend has a car and I don’t. I contribute a lot to the relationship financially and house labour, but he rarely ever drives me anywhere even if it’s for both our benefit.