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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/EnthusiasmMental1299 on 2024-01-23 05:14:11+00:00.
I'm in a relationship of about a year that I would describe as "fine." I met my boyfriend of about a year on a dating app. There were no sparks, but he was way better than the other men I'd been meeting so I thought I would see how things went. First 6ish months were good, but around the 6 month mark I noticed some things that bothered me. No major red flags, but small things. None of them on their own seemed like reasons to end the relationship and I thought we could work through them. Overtime, these things have bothered me more and more. Without going into details, we have different lifestyles, few shared interests, and he is very competitive.
At this point, it kind of feels like this relationship is not giving me what I truly want, but I'm afraid to end it.Afraid because I've already spent a year in it that I could have been using to find more compatible guys. Afraid because he was the best I could find a year ago so it seems unlikely I can find a better fit for me at this point. I'm so tired of being alone all of the time and breaking up with him means going back to being alone. I'm also in my 30s - I need to find another single man who I think is somewhat attractive and compatible with my life who also thinks I am attractive and compatible with his life. Honestly that seems so unlikely at this point. Ending things with him and starting from scratch feels so hard at an age where I wanted to be settling down and thinking about kids.
TLDR: I'm struggling with whether to stay or go from a relationship that's not really what I want in my 30s?