this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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all 13 comments
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[–] [email protected] 30 points 8 months ago (2 children)

You didn't specify they be consecutive minutes. The genie allows them all to walk for one minute, takes it away, then transports them all to your location and tells them what you did before enabling them to walk again for another four minutes. Millions of people then proceed to trample your broken body.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Me irl when somebody threatens Striker: πŸ₯°

[–] [email protected] -3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Bruh. All you had to do was post anything else but foot fetish memes.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

I dislike you for much more reasons now πŸ₯°

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Presumably, I get two more wishes.

So you know, id just wish them to the core of the sun after that. Sorry my boys. No murdering me allowed.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

You don't get the other wishes until the first has been granted, which doesn't end until they finish their little tap dance

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Gotta make it longer than that. By the time 5 minutes is up they won't even be sure if it's real or not.

Give em a few years, just enough time that they're convinced it's permanent. Just enough time that their experience with paralysis seems like a fully separate part of their life, a distant dream. Just enough time that they start going most days without even thinking about the fact that they weren't able to walk at one point.

Then pull the rug out from under them.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

11 minutes. So it can be made into two story episodes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Mostly cause I love Shoebill Storks!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

The Boaty McBoatface of the bird world.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

It'll give you the shoe bill in a minute...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Go one better and let the people who can walk only walk for 5 minutes