this post was submitted on 07 Jan 2024
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Asklemmy
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It’s okay to be bored sometimes.
If you find yourself compelled to do something that’s not destructive to society or yourself, pay attention. Not wearing headphones I brought to disc golf led me to meeting my wife. I just had a feeling not to wear them. Then I met some cool friends. Yada yada yada, life is better.
Get out of your own way. Let things play out and act when you’re able. Try being more passive about small things and see if you’re not less stressed.
Every interaction I have I try to think “how can this go more smoothly”. Life is easy mode if you make people want to be around you.
You can say no and not give a reason and people will respect it more. Give an excuse and watch them act like it’s a puzzle to be solved.
You can’t fix everything at once. You have finite willpower. Do not stack ambitious goals or habit changes.
Understand the only way to ever be good is to fail a lot. This applies to everything. Thinking, conversation, athletics, math, baking, everything.
Garbage in, garbage out. Applies to coding, your entertainment consumption, and food.
In direct contradiction to the above rule I personally believe you MUST have some garbage guilty pleasures. How could you know what’s great otherwise?
Things are not gonna stop happening ever, prioritize.
Try to be kind. People are usually just doing their best.
This is all excellent advice. Thank you for sharing it.
This. It's very easy to judge people. So every time I see a disappointment, I retract from judging, and think how could I have done better If I was in their position. (Sometimes going an extra mile and tell them, tho I dnt always get +ve feedback from that)
It works for most non-family I would say. It shuts down any instinct to investigate. If you allude to a personal issue or medical situation people are gonna want to know all about that.
The thing is it feels kind of rude at first. It’s not though. It’s clear, direct communication. If I’m planning something it’s so much easier to know who’s in.
If it’s someone you don’t want to do something with they’ll figure it out after the third no thanks or so (hopefully).
If it’s a someone you would do something with, just not that, express it! Don’t be afraid to say you don’t hunt but you love bowling or karaoke or something you think the other person might like.
I’m blessed to have a family with a low bar for “sorry can’t make it”, so I don’t typically use this for them.