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You stand up to wipe your ass?
Some people sit, some people stand. Most of the time, neither side is aware of the other side’s existence, and also cannot comprehend how they manage to do it that way.
I can't even reach for the TP without the damn toilet auto-flushing and getting my balls wet with toilet water. Why the hell would I even think to try wiping while sitting down?
Because it’s harder to reach my ass standing up. Plus, I don’t want my ass cheeks to come together and smear the shit around. Sounds like the sensitivity of the units needs adjustment.
Last time the great Sit Vs Stand Debate reared its head (on the site we left behind), iirc standers were in the minority, but not by much. I don't understand the mechanics of standing to wipe.
Surely standing smooshes the buttcheeks together? Like trying to clean a window with the blinds down
It isn't a full stand, just like a squat above the toilet. Asscheeks still very much apart, ready to receive paper.
No idea why this read for me like a response to a drill sergeant.
"WHAT'S THIS, MAGGOT? ARE YOU FULLY STANDING UP TO WIPE YOUR DIRTY ASS, RECRUIT?!"
"SIR, NO SIR! ASS CHEEKS VERY MUCH APART, READY TO RECEIVE PAPER, SIR!"
I feel like Standers have not been clear all this time, sounds like the manoeuvre is more of a crouch! Which makes far more sense than bumcheek-smooshing a fresh poop remainder.
more of a foward heave really
If it helps to know, you mainly stand with your legs, depending on your technique, your head can stay at pretty much the same height ras it was when you were sitting, sort of an upward ass salute.
I sit so this is just a guess, but I imagine they use one hand to hold one cheek apart, and the other to wipe? Otherwise yea I feel like it would make more of a mess lol
The mysterious world of the other side of the toilet stall.... you're sat there pooing like a normal human being, meanwhile in the next stall someone is stood over their own pants, pulling their bumcheeks apart one at a time for what could only ever be a half-wipe. Strange & inefficient.
Well I'm not sure how everyone else goes about it, but I've always found it easier to stand and wipe front to back, I dunno about all that sitting down or sideways wiping stuff.
Probably helps that I'm a reasonably slender guy though, it's not difficult or messy at all for me.. 🤷♂️
Excuse me?
Hahahaha. Every statement OP makes just leads to more questions.
This shit just goes deeper and deeper. What's kept wipe on, wipe off?
That's probably why we need so many techniques.
Sitting makes it hard to properly position the paper without accidentally dipping it in the poopy water.
This just leaves me more confused. What sort of toilet are you using, where your anus is close enough to the water that you might accidentally dip your paper in? Are you pooing in ponds?
That's the other debate. Wipe with arm reaching under, or around the back?
I guess the answer to that will be dependant on flexibility and arm length. I'm an around-the-back-er, can't imagine reaching underneath... feels like it'd be more of a push than a wipe, but then I don't have very long arms afaik (I kept seeing people with v long reach in MMA bouts, decided to measure my reach, was mildly disappointed to not have long arms).
Gotta make sure the poo is smooth and even on each cheek before wiping.
I'm not sure if you're trying to be silly or not, but how would a person wipe their ass while sitting? Especially on a public auto-flush toilet, where even so much as reaching for the toilet paper causes the toilet to flush and get my junk wet with toilet water...
I lean to one side, which lifts one butt cheek enough to reach my ass. Keeps the butt cheeks spread apart. I’ve never had one flush before I stood up.
Okay, but that still doesn't answer why would you do that while the toilet is auto-flushing?
It's unavoidable with these damn things, just so much as reaching for the TP triggers them to flush, getting my junk wet with toilet water. And they flush with the power of a pressure washer, meaning water is spraying everywhere in the bowl.
Act like I wanna get my hands wet trying to wipe while the damn thing inevitably starts the auto-flush... F all that, just let manually flush when I'm done.
I’ve never experienced the toilet auto flushing just from me leaning over. Maybe I’m just lucky that all the toilets I’ve used have been properly calibrated for use, and yours haven’t for some reason.
My experiences are the same as yours. The only time I'll get an auto flush while sitting is if I lean forward too far
Define 'too far'...
For these toilets around my area, you'd have to be Stretch Armstrong and literally stretch your arm out to get some TP without triggering the sensor.
Yeah I tend to agree with the comments saying it's probably something of a calibration issue, but they all seem to do that ☹️
AquaVantage with Zurn wall mounted sensors here, if it counts for anything.
It's been hit and miss for me. Sometimes I'll lean forward to get circulation back into my legs and it'll flush. Other times, I've had to press the little manual flush button before I leave the stall.
Oh, okay, I get you. Yeah these damn things here are set on a hair trigger, so to speak ☹️
Whereabouts are you? Different countries have different porcelain setups. What toilet are you using where your junk is over the water input? Do you have a magnum dong and balls?
What pisses me off more about toilets like this are the auto-off taps, they set the auto-off almost instantly. So you need to be pressing it down with one hand whilst doing some sort of meditation-esque 'one hand clapping' to clean the other. What do I have, three hands? Prob not an issue for you, as you can just hold it down with your magnum dong.
I'm in the USA, Gulf Coast area. Most of the auto-flush toilets around here have no tank and a wall mounted optical sensor. But if you're not sitting pretty much upright (as in leaning forward to get some toilet paper), the stupid sensor will trigger.
And it's not even so much about the size of my package, it's about the water pressure. When they flush, it's about similar to a pressure washer, which ends up splashing water all around and up into the bowl. I'm pretty sure it would even get a lady's bits wet with toilet water with the pressure they use ☹️
Ahh I see, it's like a nasty unwanted bidet. An unwelcome germ shower across the entire backside, nobody wants that!
I mean, it's the internet, someone somewhere probably wants that.
Those taps have an o-ring inside which is supposed to slowly release giving you time to wash your hands. When they turn off immediately it's because the part has worn and needs to be replaced.
So it's not a cost-saving, water-reducing exercise, merely lack of maintenance? Interesting.
I can't phase my hand into the seat, so yeah.
Neither do I lol. I lean to the side to lift one cheek.
Ah. There's the difference. Standing up is easier/safer for me than leaning to the side.