this post was submitted on 27 May 2025
25 points (83.8% liked)

childfree

2289 readers
82 users here now

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.wtf/post/22048899

An old friend/aquaintance I've not spoken to in a few years popped up recently and we got chatting a little over text. In the few years since we spoke she's had two babies by two different guys. They're ~6 months and ~2-3 years.

She said that we should get coffee and catch up properly, and I was sort of down, although I'm not really that enthusiastic about catching up with someone I've frankly not thought about in a few years. But hey, it's something to do, and it might be interesting. So I suggested a coffee shop near her and asked if she'd be able to get time away from the kids, but she said that no, she'd have to bring the kids along.

I don't want to be a dick but I'm really not interested in sitting in a coffee shop with two babies. They're mostly just going to be the focus of the occasion because they need constant attention, and I don't really like kids in general. And, if they cry or act up and attract attention I will hate that.

AITA? How do I tell her I'm really not interested in sitting with her babies for an afternoon?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] RowRowRowYourBot 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

OP really doesn't seem to be interested in this person beyond what they can offer OP. They don't seem to want this person as a friend.

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

Yeah that's my position too, and as someone who doesn't enjoy children. If so can only see them without their kids, then they only want to be friends with that chapter of that person's life, which is done and over. The choice isn't just coffee but the friendship. You're either still friends, kids included, or you're not and op Moves on to other friends. No wrong answer at all