this post was submitted on 16 May 2025
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The Onion
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And it's bad satire. This wasn't printed a year ago; they published this knowing exactly how fucked-up life is. It doesn't work.
The Onion, of all sites, does not need anyone's excuses.
You're all just wrong.
Satire has to be more absurd than reality - no matter how absurd reality gets. Otherwise it's just lying. There's no punch, in the punchline. This headline, god help us all, is plausible.
This is a rare case of The Onion fumbling as hard as IsGlitch. If you have to see that it's from a known comedy website, to figure out it's not real, the headline has failed as comedy.
You're gonna hate to find out that "w00t" is in the dictionary, "decimate" has been nerfed by dialectic morphology via anti-literacy engineering, and no one can never go home again.
Stop shouting like a pedant, and get back in line with the rest of us, cuz'.
This isn't a matter of "satire" versus "comedy." This is about bad comedy. This is... not... funny. People believe it. They had to check that it was not simply true.
By your overly simplistic metric, Idiocracy is no longer satire, Teach'. 🤷🏼♂️🤪
Take a breath. Count your eyelashes. Whatever. Just, breathe.
Why is "by your logic" never ever followed by someone's logic?
You're an unpleasant tone-policing troll. You've never understood this conversation. Shoo.
Says the one getting pounded by downvotes. I'm all for you finding your inner power-bottom, but lying to randos online begins with lying to yourself, friend, and that's the travesty that keeps on giving. 🤌🏼