this post was submitted on 04 Jan 2025
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why does every trans meme assume we change our name to just the other gendered version of our dead names lol. It's a trope at this point, but speaking as a trans woman that would be dysphoric af.
I guess, to be fair, I actually considered making my middle name similar to my dead name as a way out for my parents from the "it's just hard for us" but I realized I hated that idea and screw them if they think respecting me is too hard for them.
Edit: btw 2 years post come out and my dad finally used my chosen name for the first time. They can change, though my dad keeps misgendering, which shows me his heart isn't in the right place. He's thinking "appease" me as in his heart I'm still a guy, even though he definitely glanced at my chest... guh
General ease of identification. Going from "John" to "Jean" is an easier logical leap of "this is the same person" than "John" to "Sarah".
Of course, when dealing with a well known character with an easy to recognise overall design, it's kinda weird, but visual and mental recognition are in general.
Fictional characters also have a bunch of naming rules that real people don't. Quite importantly, unless you're GRRM they should not have the same or similar name to another character in your story (i.e. what you're saying, one name per person and one person per name). Else shit's just confusing, as knows anyone who tried to learn anything about Elden Ring's lore.
Names also should match the character's personality. John's John because he's meant to be pathetically average and John is the most average white american name there is. Naming him Bartholomew or Rico would not have worked for that particular character.
I would therefore posit that if John as a fictional character did transition, Jane might be a better fit due to being more common while still being familiar enough not to be confusing. Or perhaps Jess which retains an alliteration but sounds even more "basic" then Jane IMO.
I dig Jane because there's also another tie there.
John and Jane Doe, typically used when there's no personal identification.
Though I also feel like we're losing something because of the medium. Is it "Gene" like genie or "Jawn" like Jeanne?
I live in the rural South, it could genuinely go either way in my head, though I lean towards "Jawn" for the better flow from "John".
EDIT: Okay, I cannot decide which makes more sense as a pronunciation guide, if you've played Bayonetta, you've heard it pronounced.
Or Robert "all Aes Sedai names begin with M" Jordan. (To say nothing of two of the core POV characters both having names that are pronounced the same apart from a single consonant cluster.)
that's true
Jean is just the French form of John. It's not a different gendered form.
All I can conclude is that he transitioned to French
A fate worse than death (and I'm saying that as a french).
Wouldn't even wish it on Odie
hey now, some trans memes are about changing your name to "msulseth the devourer"
But see, that's a really great chosen name so I totally get that.
i don’t know, but trope or not anecdotally i can say it does happen so i try not to judge
Never would judge any real person for their chosen name, I just find it silly when it's like this in memes and stories.
I would guess it’s actually more likely in memes and stories, because using a similar name will help the more smooth brained readers follow along.
Yeah, I can totally see that being why the trope is super prevalent.
Most of my friends who are trans immediately got a nickname because it was easier to go to that instead of their dead name and then you just needed to eventually go from nickname to their new name.
Me too, I had a non-gendered nickname based on my dead name, and was going to just have my middle chosen name be a lovely name that fit that nickname. But then I decided I hated the nickname and got sour on the idea of "making it easy" for my parents to dead name me in their heart, while using a chosen name.
Ended up not having a middle name, which is cool because I get to "legally attest" to not having a middle name sometimes which I thought was interesting.