this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2024
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[–] [email protected] 71 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I gave up on reddit years ago but whenever someone posts about bidets it reminds me of my favorite reddit exchange

Someone posted asking why americans don’t use bidets. I commented, saying “am american, use bidet. Love it, shits tight”

Eventually a reply came from a confused esl person asking me if I had a constipation problem because they didn’t understand the colloquialism “shits tight”

I think about that exchange more often than I should

[–] [email protected] 1 points 14 hours ago

Someone posted asking why americans don’t use bidets. I commented, saying “am american, use bidet. Love it, shits tight”

Apparently they didn't know shit.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I mean a bidet would help with tight shit as well.

[–] reev 43 points 1 day ago (2 children)

A bidet is a miracle device, helps in any and all situations. Diarrhea? Solved. Constipation? Solved. Regular? Surprisingly, solved. Wanna do the front too? Can be a bit awkward but it's got you covered (in water, of course). Washing the throne? Solved. Basic calculus? Solved. Advanced calculus? Believe it or not, solved. Taxes? Avoided. Marriage counseling? Ever since I got my bidet my wife says my "stench is less appalling". Solved, baby. I even use it to water the garden and defend my house from intruders.

Cannot recommend enough.

[–] mnemonicmonkeys 1 points 20 hours ago

Thirsty? Solved!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Neti pot? Solved!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Would require good water pressure. Although that's a careful balancing act because you can go too far the other way. Then that's an embarrassing hospital visit.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 20 hours ago

Fires up pressure washer with extreme prejudice.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Doubtful. I have never heard of residential water pressure high enough to do any damage.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

they didn’t understand the colloquialism “shits tight”

¡Duce's Loose!