this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2024
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Facepalm

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[–] [email protected] 70 points 2 weeks ago (10 children)
[–] [email protected] 82 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 32 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I'm genuinely impressed you located a thumbnail for this response so quickly.

[–] [email protected] 57 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Fuck_u_spez_ 15 points 2 weeks ago

I want a torrent of all your memes. That's got to be quite the collection.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 48 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Some people poop naked. I do.

It all started as a kid when I accidentally dipped my T-shirt in the toilet (it was the 90s, so everyone's clothes were baggy and oversized then). So from that day on the shirt had to go.

Then in another incident, urine accidentally spilled over the bowl into my underwear, so from that day on the pants had to go as well.

It's been decades; clothes fit properly and I now know how to aim. But the habit never went away.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Are these both American-style very high water level toilet bowl problems?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

How high does their toilet water go??? An oversized t-shirt dipping into the water? Urine spilling over into your underpants?

I am frankly appalled hearing this information. Either they're living in a bizzaro wacky world or OP uses the toilet in an extraordinary fashion.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Jnco era was not natural, that explains the shirt. Wee wee is tiny and points under the raised seat. Commenter must hold said wee wee down to keep it from spraying from under the seat. Leaning forward is not enough, commenter is shaped in a way that makes wee wee aim up.

:p

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Commenter revealed in a separate post that wee wee so small it points up over the seat. Has to push it down with thumbnail to keep aim downward.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

:p knew it.

I had a cousin who pissed on himself regularly from small wiener problems when we were kids.

I feel bad about the bullying now, but his dad had a knee dangler and we used to say he took after his mom.

Every new toilet he used ended with wet pants.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Fuck you guys; I was a kid. Nobody has a 9 inch cock when they're six.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Geez. Mine dragged the ground behind me like a tail by the time I was 4.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Motherfucker, do I have to send you a timestamped dick pic?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

lol are you that worked up about this?

Just forget about it. You don’t even need your dick to be anything special. Don’t need a dick at all. :p

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Link to that comment cause I definitely did not say that.

I was a fucking kid. Everyone's penis is small when you're six.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

I'm pooping naked as we speak

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

So you strip naked every time you take a piss?

At least make up a believable story.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

If you want to halve the frequency of required toilet cleanings, you will sit to piss.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Not everyone sits to piss.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 weeks ago

He fighting for his life

[–] ryedaft 24 points 2 weeks ago

Nope, wearing flip flops

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago

He's thinking.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

I assume this is in the locker room at the gym and he is about to take a shower

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

Hey we've all had those days

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

I call that the Costanza maneuver

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

To assert dominance.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Because they (old guys) come out of the pool and put their swimming trunks in the centrifuge things to dry and then they take like an hour to get ready.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

It's a machine in the locker room where you drop your wet swimming trunks in and it mechanically wrings them out so it dries faster.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Centrifuge deez nu... Wait no

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago