this post was submitted on 07 Nov 2024
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My daughter is 5 now. She's discovered the joy of telling jokes. Unfortunately, her repertoire is painfully small. I've also realised most of my jokes are either not age appropriate or too situational.

What are best/worst kids jokes? Extra points for any that would make her teacher groan. Apparently she LOVES jokes. 😁

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? "Fsssssh" (only works if you say it out loud, and they know how to spell)

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The start of one of my favourites, that fell completely flat.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What big brown and sticky? A big stick.

What brown and hurt if it fall on you from a tree? A piano.

Que flat confused look.

5 years olds can be a tough crowd.

[–] Mouselemming 13 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Gonna jump in here so you teach your kid right:

Cue, pronounced "Q," is the spelling for "time to go on stage or say your line " or in this case, "time to look confused."

Qué is pronounced "K" and is basically Spanish for what, although "por qué?" is "Why?"

I know that because of the old joke about the lady crying at her husband's coffin "Por qué, por qué?" And the coffin opened and said "Butter." But the reference is too old.

Anyway Queue is the last one, it's English English, pronounced "Q" and means people standing in a line, just as all the silent letters are.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I thought queue came from French

[–] Mouselemming 2 points 2 weeks ago

Originally, yes.

But in present usage Americans say "line" while Brits say "queue."

I'm not sure about other Anglophone places.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

There's a few spellings I apparently have blind spot for. That is definitely one of them.