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Never take health tips from world’s oldest people, say scientists (www.theguardian.com)

submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (6 children)

(my bold)

According to the Guinness World Records website, Branyas believed her longevity stemmed from “order, tranquility, good connection with family and friends, contact with nature, emotional stability, no worries, no regrets, lots of positivity and staying away from toxic people”.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

The real secret to longevity is to have spotty health records and a difficult to verify birth certificate. Bonus points if you're in a country that has undergone multiple radical regime changes.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

(Political) scientists don't want you to know this one weird trick to eternal life!

[–] rowrowrowyourboat 12 points 3 months ago

No regrets

Damn. I regret that I lived a life with regrets. Add that to the list of regrets.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (4 children)

What are you supposed to do if you are the toxic people?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Find your toxic traits
stop doing them

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Die, I guess.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Focus on yourself instead destroying others in jealousy

[–] [email protected] -1 points 3 months ago

I'm not too concerned about toxic centenarians.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Yeah, fuck all that noise

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

I plan to outlive all of my enemies out of pure spite and toxicity so that one day I can piss on their graves/ashes.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Thinking like this could lead you to die earlier. Stress kills. If you can let anything go, you could try.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

I plan to outlive my enemies so I can pour out a bottle of the finest scotch on their grave, after it has been filtered through my kidneys.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

I'm probably going to die tomorrow 😐