this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2024
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Van de Velde was booed and jeered while competing at the Games. Dutch Olympic officials went to lengths to protect him from the press during the event.

He has now opened up to Dutch publication NOS about his experience, admitting that while he anticipated backlash, the intensity of it took him by surprise. "I definitely had a moment of breaking down, both before the tournament and during it. But I thought 'I'm not going to give others the power to bully me away or get me away'.

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (5 children)

Alright.. now I'm willing to bet that most people on here, if asked, believe strongly in criminal rehabilitation. But the comments here make me think 'maybe not'.

Would someone please explain that?

[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (3 children)

Sure. He hasn't taken any real responsibility nor faced adquete consequences for raping a child. He blames others for "bullying" rather than making any attempt to understand the outrage.

If his crime had been committed decades ago, and he faced appropriate sentencing, and made steps at reconciliation with the community this would be a more nuanced conversation.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (8 children)

He was arrested, prosecuted and convicted. He pled guilty. He served his prison sentence and underwent psychological treatment. He has taken extensive measures to avoid contact with children. This all happened over a decade ago. He repeatedly reflected on what happened and regrets it to this day.

The child in question only seems to regret he was arrested, and cut herself because of it. She doesn't seem to think negatively about him at all, and because of that he was not convicted of grooming.

At this point, what the fuck more do you want from him? He's fully rehabilitated. He knows what he did, why it's bad and has done more than enough to prevent it from happening again. This "moral outrage" is just stupid and seems to be largely fuelled by right-wing British tabloids, because here in the Netherlands nobody seems to give a shit.

What's your message here? "Rape a child, rape a dozen, we don't care because we're going to ostracize you from society forever?" Why would anyone bother to rehabilitate then?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 months ago

we're going to ostracize you from society forever

That is very different from simply not wanting him to be a representative for his country and potential role model for aspiring athletes in one of the biggest media events of the world though. Being welcomed back as a member of society is one thing, but there is a point to be made about expecting more of Olympic athletes than your average member of society.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago

The child in question only seems to regret he was arrested, and cut herself because of it.

You really do not understand the psychology of a rape victim.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202105/why-some-rape-victims-continue-to-date-their-rapist

She doesn’t seem to think negatively about him at all, and because of that he was not convicted of grooming.

How do you know what she thinks today? There is a reason many countries do not consider a 12-year-old to be able to consent to sex. They don't understand sex. They don't understand rape. They may have only been menstruating for less than a year.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Why are you defending a pedophile so hard in this thread?? He didn't even serve his full sentence since he was pulled out of the UK early. What we want from him is an apology for what he did, but it doesn't look like we will ever get that since he is now playing victim as the rapist. Maybe if he actually served his full sentence things would be a little different, but he got a small slap on the wrist for one of the worst crimes someone can commit. He should never have been sent to the Olympics as a representative of the Netherlands.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 3 months ago

I am glad you are saying this. I have started typing a similar comment several times, but didn't want to deal with the inevitable avalanche of comments from what seems to be the lemmy hive mind on this subject.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 3 months ago

no he didn't, so stop advocating for these types of people to represent, anything!

[–] [email protected] -3 points 3 months ago

Yes, child rapists should be ostracised forever. As adults, we have a responsibility to protect the children in our communities. Sorry if this is hard for you to understand but the safety of innocent children is infinitely more important than the poor delicate feelings of a child rapist. If they don't want to suffer the consequences of their actions, then they shouldn't do the bad thing.

Also, he didn't even serve the full sentence given by the court that sentenced him. So no, he did not serve his punishment. That's a load of shite. His government extradited him and let him off easy. And then they effectively spat on the whole punishment again by letting him represent his country anyway.

It doesn't matter how long ago it was. The harm was still real. And it screams "we care more about perpetrators' rights than victims." Or maybe they don't care because the victim wasn't Dutch. I don't know.

I do however agree that they shouldn't go after his family. He committed the crime, not them. Even if I am disgusted by the very idea of anyone willing to sleep with a nonce. Still not my business.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (1 children)

No sympathy for him from here, but this is an interesting conversation about justice.

Is it his responsibility that the justice system gave him the sentence it did?

Who gets to decide what is adequate consequences, how long ago the crime should have been, what is appropriate sentencing and what is appropriate steps of reconciliation?

I agree with the gut feeling that he was sentenced lightly, but as the previous comment said, how do we combine that with a belief in the rehabilitation of criminals?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

There needs to be some work on the part of the criminal. They need to at minimum show remorse and attempt to make amends with the community.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Makes sense. But does this community know whether he has done so? My understanding is that the crime was committed a decade ago, and that he admits fault. I assume nobody here followed it at the time.

It seems this community has turned very quickly to an un-nuanced discussion with very little data.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Raping a kid is very un nuanced.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Absolutely, but the morality of said rapist competing at the Olympics a decade later, after having served his sentence and possibly having been rehabilitated is a pretty nuanced subject, wouldn't you say?

[–] [email protected] -4 points 3 months ago (2 children)

What does it matter? He was sentenced and served time. Wasn't it enough, or what's your argument here?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I don't think rehabilitation is just serving time and being done with it.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 3 months ago

That's what it's supposed to be...

[–] [email protected] -3 points 3 months ago (2 children)

If you’re going to be an apologist for a predator at least understand the situation. It looks like you are arguing just to be contrarian- not a good look in this case, highly insensitive given the type of crime we are discussing.

He did not serve his full eight year sentence. He was transferred back to Holland from England to serve the remainder of his eight year sentence - and was released the same year

So to answer you: No he absolutely did not serve his sentence

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

First, don't call me an apologists, you don't know the first fucking thing about me or my beleifs.

Second, it was a four year sentence, not eight years.

Third, yes, he did serve his sentence and was released.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I absolutely believe in rehabilitation. I also don't believe that a little over a year in prison for repeatedly raping a child is enough time to rehabilitate someone who did that. As I pointed out elsewhere in the thread, he's done things like say it was a mistake, but he has yet to apologize for it. That, to me, says he has not been rehabilitated. In fact, I would say that one of the first signs of rehabilitation is to apologize for your actions.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago

Isnt that the court or parole boards fault though?

Like when they released him on parole should he have said "no, I need to stay in jail because 1 year is not enough"?

[–] [email protected] -4 points 3 months ago

If you think he didn't serve enough time, that's a flaw in the system. But then, that doesn't answer my question...

[–] funkless_eck 16 points 3 months ago

I'd argue being an Olympian, which requires relying on a mix of public funding, ones own resources (usually family or sponsors), and gives an international platform, media coverage and potential prominence is a privilege given quid pro quo for behavior befitting that privilege.

Post-rehabilitation and having served one's time - There's no reason this person couldn't practice their sport in private, there's no reason this person couldn't be a private citizen with a regular office job.

However, I'm sure you could agree that they shouldn't ever be allowed to work with children again, so there must be a line of compromise you agree with.

I'd also argue that knowing that one's mistakes - although paid for - may have lifetime consequences - are also part of the rehab process. Like how alcoholics can never have one drink again.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I get the impression that many lemmy users don't have a lot of life experience. Everyone deals in absolutes and ideals, no one seems to see the nuance.

The question of "should this guy be allowed to compete" is a complex one, and anyone who thinks there's an easy answer is an idiot.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's the exact opposite of a complex question. People who rape children shouldn't be allowed to represent their nation at the Olympics. That's a hard line in the sand that normal people are perfectly fine with. It's amazingly reasonable. No one who rapes a child gets rewarded with honor and respect. If they serve an appropriate punishment and show remorse, two things he never did, you can return to life. You should not however be honored on the national and even worldwide stage that is a privilege that should be lost forever. Don't like it? Don't rape kids. Not a lot of nuance needed.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

This is exactly the kind of perspective I'm talking about. Well done.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

"Everyone deals in absolutes" sure sounds a lot like an absolute. It's easier to fall into using absolutes in short form, instantaneous internet comments.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

No, that's a generalisation.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Not for pedos.

/Thread