this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2024
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No kidding. I'm apparently the only person who has ever had an amicable divorce where we just realized we weren't compatible and never felt the need to bash each other. The post-divorce crowd can be pretty dire. They should mandate a certain number of therapy sessions before you can sign up for a dating app.
what i don't get is why people married people they knew were awful people, or awful for them.
anytime someone lies, cheats, or steals from me (or shows any disrespect, like verbal/physical abuse) i dump their ass.
My ex was a chill stoner with a good work ethic when we got together and we had many good years, then he lost job after job, stopped looking, got radicalized reading Stormfront, then eventually physically abusive. I could not convince him to seek help, since he got so paranoid.
People change, sometimes you change in opposing directions.
that isn't change, that's failure to take responsibility for yourself. which makes for a shitty person, and a shitty partner.
hence why most radicalized people are shitty human beings. de-radicalizing requires people to realize they are responsible for their choices, and that the world is not some external force oppressing them.
Well it was a change, but I don't disagree. Instead of trying, he just looked for someone to blame. It's not like there aren't external forces but our own actions and thoughts are what we can control, and can make a big difference. He's doing better now, too late for us but he's working, paid child support, stopped drinking, still a racist fuck but realized he was his biggest problem and did work on himself.