this post was submitted on 16 May 2024
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[–] [email protected] 54 points 6 months ago (5 children)
[–] [email protected] 41 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Doing something you enjoy ✅

Doing something with a community ✅

Doing something different to your normal routine ✅

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

therapy is anything you want it to be. there are 100s of styles, varieties, and etc.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

therapy is whatever makes life worth living, in a broad sense, in a more narrow sense it's whatever improves your being day to day.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

and according to some folks in this thread the only thing making life worth living is seeing a therapist... and you can't possibly be well adjusted if you don't.

that is what we call 'projection'.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

this is what we call the "therapist industrial complex"

im kidding, but no seriously.

[–] FellowEnt 3 points 6 months ago

I've witnessed these old boys hanging out tinkering and chatting. The best kind of therapy.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago

That is a hobby. A lovely one, but still a hobby. That is not therapy.

I'm not saying you can't gain insights into yourself or situations while doing that. It can most definitely help and be therapeutic. But therapy it is not

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

No offense to you, but I definitely don't think this will address quite a few things that therapy can.

If all you are suffering from is a lack of direction in life, then this absolutely will help. You could even see improvements in social anxiety and social aptitude.

Anger problems, though? Alexithymia? Chronic episodes of mental dissociation? I don't think working on the train crew's gonna help

At the same time, It's definitely been conjected that therapy is mostly woman-focused and isn't as effective for men for various reasons. That kind of lines up with a few of my previous therapists, who felt like worthless experiences for me. I have heard of some new therapy styles implemented in certain places, though, that do sound to be genuinely helpful to dudes.

Edit: "social anxiety and social anxiety" woops

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

You make a decent point and illustrate by your "woman-focused" that there is a decided lack of professional therapists geared to male issues. This is why we have learned to find inner peace through creative activities. It lets us focus on the task instead of stewing on things over which we have little if any effect or control

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I think most men have not learned to find inner peace and still suffer from closeted issues. The rate of suicide amongst men is still so high. There's definitely a bias we dudes who find hobby communities, where we assume that most dudes have found these spaces. I'd argue most dudes in the US are still suffering from isolation.

I don't think the fact that many therapists are 'woman-focused' is a reason to avoid therapy. You can still find a therapist that really helps. It may just take several tries. As I also mentioned, there are efforts to create methods that are more effective for men, and you can seek out those groups as well.

There is also still a strong stigma against seeking therapy, and I definitely see that argument about therapy being 'woman-focused' being thrown out as an excuse not to try therapy at all.