this post was submitted on 10 May 2024
739 points (98.9% liked)

Not The Onion

12233 readers
836 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 124 points 6 months ago (7 children)

Microsoft has been a fucking blight on gaming. Paid online, and timed exclusives both started there. No resale if we didn't throw a massive fit about it. Buying up studios to kill them. I mean Sony has their share of being fucks as well, but at least they're making good games. Microsoft has barely any decent games the last 2 generations, and hellblade 2 which is looking great was a Sony game that they had to buy and make exclusive.

[–] [email protected] 62 points 6 months ago (2 children)

In a sane country there would be laws to prevent this monopoly shit.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)

By next elections, it will be even more insane.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (5 children)

Looks at ballot.

"Is carbonite, like...an actual thing? Can I be frozen like Han Solo? I have a little bit of money saved up. Which stupid tech bro startup can do this for me?"

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

wait so the bodies are frozen after the person has already died?

I thought the point was to get frozen while still alive so that you could be thawed out in the future and continue living. which, while still very stupid, is something I can wrap my head around as a concept.

am I just now learning that the whole thing is predicated on the wish that we will one day be able to reanimate dead people??

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

They ideal for most of them is absolutely that they can be frozen while still alive and unfrozen later. We are nowhere near that technology though so most fallback to the second hope. Yes, that is that when they're unfrozen in the future we can cure whatever it is that killed them. From what I've seen in documentaries, most of the people signing up know it's the world's furthest longshot, but they figure they're dead either way, why not take it? Worst that happens is they stay dead but hopefully science learned something from their body at least, best case is they wake up in the 24½th century and keep on truckin.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Also, considering that they need access to freeze things inside of you quickly enough, such as your brain, I think most subjects would prefer that they were dead first.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Let's ask Ted Williams's frozen head. What do you think, Ted?

Ted Williams's frozen head: ...

Thanks Ted

[–] the_post_of_tom_joad 4 points 6 months ago

Turns out those rich fuckers currently being scraped off the sides of their cryochambers had the right exit strategy all along.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Alcor is generally considered your best cryonics bet right now. Not a great bet, but your best bet.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I don't have carbonite but for the right price I can pack you into a freezer filled with ice. That should do the trick.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Shut up and take my doge coins!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago (2 children)

In a sane country there would be laws to prevent this monopoly shit.

The problem is that Microsoft is no monopoly in gaming.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

They have the money to basically buy any studio they want if they could, Nintendo and Sony included.

Their gaming division isn’t a monopoly, but with their parents funding yeah they could be and that’s the problem. They could buy everyone up and leave them selves alone in the market.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Their gaming division isn’t a monopoly, but with their parents funding yeah they could be and that’s the problem.

I agree it's a problem but without Microsoft being a monopoly in gaming, no watchdog will do anything about it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

The FTC was trying to do something. Than Microsoft convinced them they weren’t going to do X if they sold Y, so they let the cloud gaming go, and then immediately did what they said they wouldn’t.

If they didn’t lie to the FTC they would have done something about it than and there.

It’s not a monopoly until it is, and that’s what they are trying to avoid, stuff getting to that point in the first place.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Are you referring to the ABK layoffs? Or something else here?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Yes, they let the cloud gaming go so the EU wouldn’t deem them a monopoly, they than told the FTC they weren’t going to lay anyone off. And a month later or so they laid off 2000 employees while using the excuse it was happening anyways regardless of the merger.

What other merger was there you could be confusing this with?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

I wasn't confusing any merger, I was wondering what action specifically you were referring to is all. There were a few different points the FTC was concerned with in that case.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

So you want to do something about it after they are a monopoly?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (2 children)

So you want to do something about it after they are a monopoly?

Me? Why me? You were talking about countries and I was explaining that countries don't apply monopoly laws to non-monopolies.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Sorry, replied to the wrong guy. Disregard.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Actually the laws are meant to apply BEFORE that happens.

What good is trying to stop a monopoly after it’s fully established? You need to deal with it when it starts, not when it’s done.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago

Tbf Microsoft is a blight, ful stop.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

They wanted to be the new Sony and Nintendo combined, but instead they're the new EA.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

Trying to force online only as well. That nearly killed an entire console generation for them.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

You say, "timed exclusives" as a negative meanwhile Nintendo dominates the market and never releases its exclusives.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

HB 1 was a Sony exclusive initially. Launched on xbox later. Microsoft then bought the developer making 2 Xbox only.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I don't think it was a sony exclusive, it was simply released on ps4 and pc only

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Microsoft has barely any decent games the last 2 generations

I remember buying the XBox and only ever owning Halo for years, because the rest of the library was utter shit. Then Halo got too popular and Microsoft had to gut the talent and sell the husk for scraps.