Don't worry mate, everyone has different hormone levels and needs. Maybe you were naturally higher test than some. Maybe your height and weight means you need longer to adjust. Maybe you started at a different age and have to fight off more initial changes.Most likely, you just have body dysmorphia that's not allowing you to see the changes. If it's what you really want, just keep at it. Others will notice the changes before you do.
SadSadSatellite
Baba is you: a simple block pushing puzzle game where you make the rules by lining up words. It's not like anything else.
Iron lung: a short horror game about navigating a submarine blind
Dollhouse: a flim noir styled avoid the pursuer type horror game, with eack level adding new mechanics. One of the most interesting games I've played, but it got lost to a ten year hype train and never recovered from the initial review bombing.
Jazzpunk: hard to describe. An first person puzzle game where the whole game is a joke and every aspect is unexpected.
Papers please: run a Soviet bloc security check point, and try to keep your family alive with the small amount of supplies you receive for filtering citizen correctly. Same guy who made obra dinn.
Receiver 2: at the surface it's an fps with insane gun mechanics. Deeper though, it's forced meditation and mindfulness. Nothing you do can be reactionary or automatic, every movement must be on purpose. Lots of mental health themes.
Many others already mentioned here are great. Obra dinn, doki doki, antichamber, outer worlds. There's a ton of great things out there.
I've read this three times and still honestly have no idea what you're saying and how it applies to the question.