I can talk to animals
this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2023
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I can undo and retry fumbled social interactions.
But you shit yourself while you're going home every time.
But the memory of each fumble haunts you permanently.
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I have a set of mental buttons i can press which lets me instantly fix some common flaws of being a human:
- fall asleep
- stop humming a song stuck in my head
- stop feeling light headaches
- postpone hunger for 3 hours
- shut of tinnitus
- make the itching stop
When you push one of those buttons, it's effect is random.
"I really need to get this song out of my head so I can concentrate on cla....ZZZZZZZZZZ"
You fall asleep easily, but you have wicked sleep apnea.
You can stop humming songs but it dials the intrusive thoughts up to 11
Good news, your light headaches have been replaced with moderate migraines.
You can postpone your hunger for 3 hours, but anything you consume within that window you permanently develop a sickness taste aversion to.
The ringing in your ear has been replaced with the Wilhelm scream.
The itching has stopped. The only price was IBS.
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I can see dead people
... and they see you. You remind them of the taste of food. It's been so long.
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Telekinesis with no mass limit.
But it also has no speed limit, causing items you pull around to reach light speed almost instantly, effectively growing to infinite size for the duration of the pull
Honestly, in controlled conditions, I think I can benefit humanity with this.
I can find any lost object.
You have to sort through every object anyone has ever lost to do so
Any object you locate begins looking for you