What was your first girlfriend like?
error: IndexOutOfBoundsException
this post was submitted on 23 Oct 2023
562 points (96.2% liked)
Programmer Humor
32568 readers
372 users here now
Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)
Rules:
- Posts must be relevant to programming, programmers, or computer science.
- No NSFW content.
- Jokes must be in good taste. No hate speech, bigotry, etc.
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
Ah shoot, she's actually their zeroth girlfriend
The best programming languages let you pick if arrays are base 0 or 1. Shout out to Option Base 1.
Shout out to PHP which just don't give a fuck $arr['apple'] = 5
PHP causes so many issues because of the fact that it uses the same syntax for both arrays and dictionaries/maps. [] (or array() in older PHP versions) always JSON encodes to [] because there's no way to tell if it's supposed to represent an empty array or an empty dictionary.
Eh. It works just fine. I agree JSON encoding is weird but if you use it the recommended way (just use a StdClass object and throw on the fields you need) it works fine. Someone added half assed support for weird PHP arrays that usually works and is generally good enough.
stdClass is for objects. I'm talking about maps. I guess you could use stdClass for maps too, but that feels weird.
If you read the docs for json_decode, the default behavior is to operate with stdClass - I too prefer working with associative arrays because of their power but... that kind of just reinforces how useful they are. PHP can give you the full Java class system if you want.. it's just a pain and useless in most circumstances so we all just toss around associative arrays.
Perl had $[ (yes, just those two characters) to allow setting of the first array index, but it's a fatal error to put anything but 0 into it now.
Of course, since Perl arrays can be negative subscripted from the last element, you can stand on your head and index the array negatively from the wrong end. -1, -2, -3 etc. Use unshift to put things on the beginning (logical "end") of what you're doing rather than the usual push. Presto, a 1-based array (up to sign, anyway).
You may wish to file this under "stupid, but it works".
People with more time / more need for something that looks professional, would probably be better off writing something that uses tie instead. (Or, yes, yes, a different language entirely, hush now.)
Thanks I hate it.
But still better than mathlab not allowing 0 indexed arrays.
I hate when I am written in Pascal
You gotta allocate your GFs statically or this just keeps happening.
I tried to declare my GF global, but she became an astronaut, and I get linking errors
Mate, your GF is definitely global. I was able to access her just fine.... read AND write.
Plus you won't worry that you forget to free her
As low as my opinion on some exes may be, I still don't believe it's appropriate to mark them as candidates for garbage collection.
I'd add an imaginary boolean flag to the GF class and always have an initial GF where imaginary == True.
The struct and its CRUD functions seem to be all implemented. Problem is: The Create method is never be called.
Might be a problem with the factory then.
*'^You gotta allocate you GF$'
should have used Rust instead. that way you never talk to a friend in the first place
girlfriend_list->start
Segmentation fault (core dumped)
Pointer references protected (Canadian) memory.