this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2023
977 points (98.5% liked)

Programmer Humor

19932 readers
1217 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
977
What we really mean (programming.dev)
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 

IMHO, it's a horrible hack that is just broken. It's obscure and we need to rewrite it because it has a bad structure. ^X^Cquit^[ESC][ESC]^C

all 40 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 47 points 2 years ago (3 children)

The best way I know to quit vi is by turning off your computer

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 years ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago
[–] Kftrendy 10 points 2 years ago

Because you meant to open ed: the standard text editor.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I wanted to open neovim of course. And my alias did not work

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Because you've finished configuring the evil package, obviously.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago (2 children)

you can also accomplish that by turning off city's electrical grid

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

Takes too long for the UPS to run down...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

i see you're operating at datacenter scale

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

This is the way.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 years ago

I'm one of those people who think that Perl is a write-only language
-Linus torvalds

[–] [email protected] 35 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

"I can read this Perl scrip"t should translate to "I'm lying".

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 years ago (2 children)

ESC + :q!

ESC to enter normal mode (if you're in a different mode like insert) : (colon) to enter commands q to quit ! (or a) to use the quit command withiut keeping any changes

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 years ago

He's speaking the language of the gods..

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

ESC + (shift) ZZ is faster and also saves your changes!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

good to know :3

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The first phrase spoken when opening a new project, be it yours or someone elses... "What the fuck..."

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

What fucking idiot wrote this? Looking at your own code from 6 months ago

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 years ago

I can't read this perl script may also apply to something you wrote last week.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

I'm absolutely guilty of self-documenting code, but mostly because I'm sick of everyone else's lying comments.

[–] Gentoo1337 13 points 2 years ago

"The reason I use Perl is because I wanna write scripts that no one can read and no one can understand so that I can keep my job"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

IMHO it's a complex, temporary work around with a few issues.

Also vim > emacs

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

i use nano and i will die on this hill

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Nano is the only one I know how to use lol (assuming we're talking about in-terminal text editors)

And i have used it exclusively for editing Minecraft and KSP server config files

Im definitely a programmer :P

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Self documenting: my code doesn't NEED comments

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Hey, now. It is possible to write readable Perl code—it's just less interesting that way. 😜

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Sometimes I like to pack the most functionality into a single, hard to read one-liner, just for fun. In review I’ll admit “it’s a little bit abstruse”.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

The Perl one has got me:)

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Of course, the correct way to quit Vi is ^Zpkill vi.

[–] csm10495 1 points 2 years ago

Lol I've done this before!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Emacs babyyyy

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Good reference with lots of truth. Maybe, I should print it before having a meeting with other tech teams.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I've been seeing a lot of Perl jokes lately and as far as legacy code I haven't had to edit anything written in that in 25 or so years. For those that haven't used it, getting form variables and rudimentary things like that were like equivalent to regular expressions, everything had some obscure expression you had to look up or copy paste.