this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2023
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submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 
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[–] LetterboxPancake 32 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Who/what is Shrek in this case? Living in a non-english speaking country maybe?

[–] LetterboxPancake 31 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Last Christmas, Wham!

(The band's name was "Wham!")

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

...I'm an idiot

That's actually really funny

[–] LetterboxPancake 6 points 11 months ago

Chill, it took me a second as well 😅

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

I gave you my heart!

[–] Lucidlethargy 2 points 11 months ago

He is love. Shrek is love.

Also, he was born in America. Sorry...

[–] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This isn't a joke. And it's not just MC.

From 2002-2008, I worked two full-time retail jobs. Overtime was common at both around the holidays. 2006 was insane for me. Like, the number of weekly hours I worked that year sound like I'm lying, and Thanksgiving to New Year's was crazy in comparison to the rest of that crazy year.

Anyway: Christmas. Retail. I'd work 10+ hours at job 1, then go to job 2 and put on another 8-10 hours, then I'd crash for however long until the next shift. All the while it would be the same 20 or so Christmas songs over and over and over.

Between shifts, there'd still be Christmas music. Gas station? Christmas music. Restaurants? Christmas music. Bank? Christmas music.

Sometimes I'd sleep at my mom's house between shifts because it was closer to one of my jobs. She'd be up, getting into the spirit by.... listening to Christmas music. Even in my sleep, it haunted me.

I can still vividly remember Christmas shopping for my niece and nephew in 2006, standing in line at a Toys R Us holding this big stuffed animal. "Wonderful Chrismastime" by Paul McCartney was on. That fucking refrain penetrated my psyche like it never had before, and I literally began to shake.

"Simply. Having. A wonderful Christmastime."

I thought I was going to cry. Or just start screaming. Or maybe grab someone and punch them until the police arrived. But I didn't do any of those things.

I set the stuffed animal on the floor, I walked outside, and I sat in my car, staring blankly at nothing, and I chain smoked a full pack of cigarettes, lighting them off one another. And then I went back to work.

That was 17 years ago, and sometimes I still drop what I'm doing and leave a store if that, or one of a handful of other songs, come on.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

You definitely aren't alone. I know people who have PTSD from Christmas music.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

One of my friends said they went to a new Publix near them this weekend and they had a Santa there for the kids. Forget Halloween and Thanksgiving. Straight to Christmas.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

My local Pricesmart (Costco equivalent) already has Christmas stuff up for sale as of this week. Global warming is melting her earlier every year.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

SHE'S BREACHING CONTAINMENT

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

Who would even be bringing their kids to Santa in September?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (3 children)

All I want for Christmas is you

[–] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] LetterboxPancake 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

They summoned the Christmas demons. It begins.

THEY ARE COMING!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

humuna humuna humuna HUMUNA HUMUNA HUMUNA HUMUNA

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You!...uh uh uh uh....uh uh uhahhhh ahh uh oooo!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

BUM BUM BUUUM BUM

[–] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

When I was a kid I used to love going out to eat at some big restaurant on Christmas day until I thought about it and realized the workers there weren't spending Christmas with their families and having a good time like I was. Then Christmas started becoming sad.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

:(

Maybe if they didn't celebrate Christmas they spent time with their family on a different day and made a good amount of money because no one else wanted to work

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)

That's what I did, made so much money! My parents were emergency workers (they're both retired now) and it was pretty common for one or both of them to have to work on Christmas Day. So we celebrated it on a different day most years, wasn't a big deal to us. Now they're all about having Christmas on Christmas, but I figure that's fair. They lost out on a bunch keeping other people's families safe. They deserve it

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

They're fucking heroes is what they are... o7

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

I realize it's anecdotal, but I go out of my way to not patronize businesses on federal holidays.

If it wasn't profitable they'd be closed. I've been the guy working a holiday and hearing "oh its such a shame your open". Fuck you Mr. Jergeson, you standing here proved some fucking bean counter right - you're here spending money justifying the store being open.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

But we've only hit mid-September.

There really needs to be laws about this stuff.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I've seen Christmas stuff for sale before Halloween stuff in stores before.

Hell cannot exist after death because we are already living in it.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

My local costco already has beer advent calendars for sale.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Glad im not working in the supermarket anymore

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You've escaped, others are not so fortunate

We must save them

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

Grocery store music is horrible.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Oh god, it's in my head now.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

Sorry bud, it's not leaving for six months

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I heard it in a coffee shop just the other day. Several customers and employees complained and the manager skipped the song all in about 30 seconds

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago

The revolution has begun

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It's almost time, she requires the pain of retail workers to sate her fury for the rest of the year.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

She's like a vampire of suffering and Christmas festivities

[–] lowered_lifted 9 points 11 months ago

Sleigh Ride is worse IMO because there are so many different versions. Also "winter wonderland" has way too many versions. There's so many damn snowmen that they pretend are Parsons Brown...

[–] can 9 points 11 months ago

I'll take that a thousand times over hearing Christmas Shoes

[–] PaupersSerenade 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

SHES EVLOVLING

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

Earlier and earlier every year. It's so incremental that you'll be surprised but it won't feel too far off buying a costume in June. Spirit has been training for this by cannibalizing stores of all sizes and types. They are ready to assimilate us.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

I hope we don't get seasonal playlists. They were playing the KLF in here the other day. We have a pretty good selection at the moment.