On a related note, if the bill already has a “gratuity” entry on it, am I still expected to tip on top of that?
Asklemmy
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- [email protected]: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~
If you're sitting down at a table having a meal with a waiter who is taking your order and bringing you your food then yes, 15-20% tip is strongly encouraged. If you're going into a place where you order your food at a counter and pick it up yourself to take to your table or back to your home then tipping is not necessary.
My rule of thumb is whether I'm getting a service or a product. If I eat at a restaurant and I have a waiter, I'll tip. If I eat at a restaurant and there is no waiter I generally don't tip.
For example. I don't tip at ice cream or froyo places. I just served myself. Why would I tip?
In America, if you don't tip for things like restaurant table service or delivery, rides (like taxis or Uber), car valet, room service, or someone helping you with your bags, yes, you are the asshole. Yes, tipping is usually just subsidizing employers' payrolls, which is bad, but it is also the cultural norm here. You are likely to be publicly dressed down if you fail to tip, even accidentally. Sorry, but that's just the way it is until we get some real worker organization and empowerment going.
Doordash driver: The federal government values mileage at $0.63/mile for tax purposes. They would value the vehicle expenses of a 6-mile delivery at $3.78.
Minimum wage in my state is $10.10 per hour. A 6-mile delivery takes 20 minutes, or $3.03. Anything less than $6.81 for this delivery, and the driver is earning less than minimum wage.
DD typically pays the driver $2.
A tip less than $4.81 means you expect the driver to earn less than minimum wage.
There's another problem: Doordash's primary rating system for it's drivers is "acceptance rate". The higher your acceptance rate, the higher you are prioritized for offers. The lowest tier of drivers has to wait for everyone in the area above him to be unavailable or to reject an order before he gets to work.
When a customer makes a low-tip or no-tip order, they expect a driver to pay for the privilege of delivering the order, and they are willing to ding the acceptance rating of every single driver in the area who refuses to work at a loss.
Note that this is worse even than restaurant tipping.
Restaurant workers have to make at least minimum wage. If the tips don’t get there, the employer must fill the difference.
I think DoorDash gets away with this because technically they are not the employer, the worker is “self-employed”.
Not at all: Not if you avoid purchasing anything involving tipped-services! People who pay their workers so little that they need to be tipped tend not to get my business.
People shouldn't need to tip, laws should be passed requiring a living wage
So will AITA if I don’t tip?
Yes
Is it really my personal responsibility to make sure my server is paid enough?
Because of the circumstances, taxes, and customs, yes -- in this case -- the responsibility has been pushed onto you.
You're right that it is ridiculous and unfair, but it is also currently the way it is. By not following the custom, the one being most hurt is the one least able to do anything about it. You also have to walk around afterward thinking that you maybe did not do the best thing.
It seems there’s a lot of discussion about getting rid of tipping, but I don’t know how much has changed in this regard.
Some experiments have been tried, and in some places a 'service charge' appears in lieu of tipping (you need not tip in these places).
Also, recently, counter service has put out tip jars and credit-card screen prompts for before-service tipping. You need not do it at all there. However, if a server has served you beyond the counter, tipping after the service is customary.
To tip 20%, take the subtotal (before the taxes), and move the decimal point one to the left. $28.00 becomes 2.800 (10%) then double that result, $5.60 (20%) is a good full-service tip on a $28.00 bill. More is welcome but never expected or required. Tipping down to 15% is fine, too, don't try to make it an exact science. Tipping outside of 15-20% -- after the service -- is usually done to send a message although studies have not shown that servers really care about those messages too much.
Because of this dastardly system, not tipping is particularly bad because tipping is most of their income. By not tipping, they are working essentially for nearly free in most U.S. states (a very low hourly rate, well below poverty wages).
And finally, if you don't know, honestly and politely ask them or a manager. "I'm not from the USA. Can you tell me how much I am expected to tip in this situation?" Servers may be a little generous with their answer, but most people are honest and happy to know that you will not stiff them for their tip.
Tips are a way for service industry workers to avoid taxes. I wonder if there's any reliable statistics on how many workers in the service industry report their tips accurately to the IRS
I would respectfully disagree. There is an entire system for tracking tips: https://www.irs.gov/newsroom/tip-income-is-taxable-and-must-be-reported and https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/tip-recordkeeping-and-reporting. For another, the whole tipping process was discovered by wealthy Americans:
Wealthy Americans in the 1850s and 1860s discovered the tradition, which had originated in medieval times as a master-serf custom wherein a servant would receive extra money for having performed superbly well, on vacations in Europe. Wanting to seem aristocratic, these individuals began tipping in the United States upon their return. https://time.com/5404475/history-tipping-american-restaurants-civil-war/
In an ideal world, service industry workers would be paid a living wage, and there would be no tips required. That’s how it should be.
Ultimately, tips are a way for “owners" to avoid paying fair wages, using the customer base to subsidize the employee’s wages. I won’t even go into instances where the owners steal tips from their staff.
Do some people under-report tips? Probably. But will most service workers, who can barely afford to survive in this country, incur the risk of being audited by the IRS if they don’t report tips and get penalized thousands of dollars for their meager hundreds? I very much doubt it. And yes, the IRS does go after the little guy - a lot. It’s cheaper than going after rich people with lawyers.
Yes. You are actually the asshole if you don’t tip.
Others have answered the question, but I did want to mention - many people mention that tips are important because employees can be paid below minimum wage, but this varies state by state, and in my experience tipping is standard regardless of this.
Here's a table of minimum wage by state:
https://www.dol.gov/agencies/whd/state/minimum-wage/tipped
The "Minimum Cash Wage" column is the "tipped" minimum wage - this is what employers can pay for jobs that get tips. The "Basic Combined Cash & Tip Minimum Wage Rate" is the minimum wage for non-tipped jobs, as well as the minimum a tipped employee must receive in wage plus tips - if they don't make enough tips, legally the employer must pay the difference.
So for example, in Washington state where I am, the minimum wage is $15.74 whether you're tipped or not, but it's still considered rude not to tip, and 20% is still the standard "good" tip.