During Covid, I picked up the guitar again, having given it up decades ago. I didnt expect to play gigs or anything, I just wanted to use the quarantine opportunity to do something positive, and I chose music, over writing a book, learning a language, etc.
Almost five years later, my guitar playing has gotten pretty good, upper intermediate level, and I am good enough to entertain myself, which is all I ever wanted.
What I hadn't expected was how much of an improvement it would make on my mental health. After being energized by my improving skills, I realized that my mood and self-esteem and confidence were significantly elevated. I am proud of my progress, even if nobody else hears it.
I also realized that I think I've been operating under a low-grade depression for a long time, perhaps my entire life. I've never addressed it because I thought that was just what life felt like. Once I had a closer look at how much better I could feel, i realized that I haven't felt "right" for a long time, maybe never. I'm still not sure I know what "right" really feels like.
Now that America has officially gone to Hell, I'm extremely worried about the future (I have a history degree, and am very knowledgeable about politics and history, and know where all of this is leading), but daily, sometimes hourly, doses of music are helping me cope.