this post was submitted on 14 Mar 2025
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The Onion

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RFK Jr. Claims Measles Can Be Cured With A Good Concealer (theonion.com)
submitted 2 weeks ago by mn42@discuss.tchncs.de to c/theonion@midwest.social
20 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

"The truth is, if Americans just had proper access to lightweight cosmetic products capable of hiding blemishes, eliminating uneven skin tone, and highlighting natural complexion, measles could be eradicated.”

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[–] otacon239@lemmy.world 60 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Ate the onion. Full bite and all. Satire is dead.

[–] Walican132@lemmy.today 9 points 2 weeks ago

Same. I was about to ask who doesn’t have access to concealer. Damn it’s been years since when got me this good.

[–] drtaco@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago

Me too. But in our defense, it wouldn't be the stupidest thing he's ever said, had he actually said it.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 35 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Thought this was real for a second

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

Just wait a few more seconds. Chances are you’ll be right soon.

[–] Sauerkraut@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 2 weeks ago

It isn't far from Trump's official position that diseases (like covid) are only a problem if we test for them.

[–] cabron_offsets@lemmy.world 21 points 2 weeks ago

Second guessing whether real or satire. Interesting times.

[–] SapphironZA 20 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I have to find this as a t-shirt.....

Edit: https://institchesbysara.com/shop/p/you-listened-to-rfk-oregon-trail-inspired-classic-unisex-crewneck-t-shirt

In case you were wondering

[–] JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 2 weeks ago

Didn't see the community and came very close to sharing this as if it were real.

[–] tonytins@pawb.social 10 points 2 weeks ago

Swear, I had to do a double take on the source. xD

[–] match@pawb.social 8 points 2 weeks ago

I'm sick of my onion-or-not dilemmas being resolved by looking at the community name. Can we get a c/maybetheonion?

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 8 points 2 weeks ago

I hate that I had to check the source... You shouldn't have to check the source on a headline like that :(

[–] miss_demeanour@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 weeks ago

Concealer is made with seed oil.

[–] Sibbo@sopuli.xyz 6 points 2 weeks ago

Wait, no horse dewormer this time?

[–] WaxiestSteam69@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

It's impossible to enjoy The Onion now.

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

I see theonion... I still don't BELIEVE its theonion... fuck this timeline

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

it does fix one of the symptoms yes

[–] upandup 2 points 2 weeks ago

I wish someone would “cure “the United States of RFK Junior

[–] thevoidzero@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

And you can buy it from his wife.