Asklemmy

I think you're well aware that small political differences shouldn't get in the way of family and have worked to be tolerant in the past.

You're not an asshole. You're an adult. You shouldn't do this lightly but if you've given this serious consideration you should follow your heart.

Your last paragraph contains the clue. What message do you genuinely believe your brother will understand from you refusing to attend his wedding? Will it do any good? Does it seem likely to change anyone's behavior?

If yes, then don't go. If no, then put that thought aside and reconsider whether you actually want to go, then decide based on that.

Either way some people will think you're an asshole.

In a vacuum, yeah obviously he's being a piece of shit. I'm honestly not really sure what his point is in saying Democrats did it first? So... it's ok because they did it first? Or it's bad, but we're only saying something because the other team did it ("it's [d]ifferent")?

Frankly, your brother might just be a fucking idiot that believes whatever is put in front of him. That sucks, especially when you have to hear his regurgitated Nazi apologia, but it's fuzzier whether that means you shouldn't go to his wedding.

I mean, it's also possible that he's actively malignant, but his response indicates to me a lack of critical thinking.

And if you want to skip your brother's wedding because he's an idiot, then that's ok! You get to set your own rules and boundaries based on your values and what you are willing to tolerate.

Personally, I'd probably go. Sure, he has shitty beliefs, but if that's only because they were spoon fed in meme format to him, is that his fault? Or is that the fault of whatever algorithm he's subjected to (which is likely under pro-billionaire influence)?

Either way, I'd recommend spending some time thinking about it before you decide.

He is getting married in a foreign country soon

Where is he getting married? Plan a nice holiday in this country and take half a day to attend the wedding just for showing your face. Stand at the back of the room, make sure enough people see you to say you were there, then slowly back away and continue with your nice holiday of the country.

Or save your money and get absolutely loaded on blackjack and hookers back home.

In theory, it would be much better to keep debating calmly without personal attacks. Giving up on friends and relatives will keep polarizing society and lead to a civil war in the end. I know this is difficult, when there is no common ground, and neither facts not science exist anymore.

the current pantomime is clearly designed to divide us and it's working quite well.

you wouldn't be an arsehole, but divide and conquer is exactly what they want

Personally I think you’re pushing one hot button waiting for it to blow. I’m sure my father voted for trump. Should I not see him because of it? Or half of America? Wanting your brother to agree with you by punishing him just makes you look childish.

That said, I don’t know the rest of the dynamic. Others might say it’s worth it but honestly you all are just fighting over minor values. Do you expect all family to have exactly your values? Are you a liberal? Because this honestly seems like a lib more than a leftist move. Playing intellectually superior while trying to emotionally hurting the other.