this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2024
72 points (92.9% liked)

Shitty sysadmin

278 readers
2 users here now

Welcome to Shitty Admin!

This community is for shit posting about terrible things computer admin do. Cross posts are welcome and so is satire.

Please no politics or harmful content

founded 4 months ago
MODERATORS
 

When I run and crimp cables I always get super horny. How do I stop?

top 15 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 42 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Why would you need to stop

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Exactly ... What's the problem here?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Those guys again?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Unplug them while masturbating

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago

Honestly I wish I knew.
The amount of times it has happened to me being 30M up a telecom tower. Stripping back that outer sheath to reveal those 4 twisted pairs, bending them over like a bad girl so I can snip the plastic separator............... I'm not even out of bed yet and I need a new pair of pants.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Union -> Better job -> no demo of old cabling full of condensed negatively charged fart Hantavirus* dust -> stress free and satisfied stripping and squeezing new KittyCat6 all day -> less showering after work -> less scrubbing** -> less tugging.

* Don’t fuck with Hantavirus and filth in general for real though. Be careful around mouse poo and demand more from employers who think IT is immune from safe workplace standards.

** Like a man

Edit: I meant to shitreply but not sound preachy but solid points so I’ll leave them but really I just wanted to talk about dirty fart cables because I have kinks too.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Have you tried turning it off and on again? If that doesn't work, you need to discharge the capacitors.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

Electricity is stored in the balls

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Have you tried placing the faulty erect member in rice?

If that doesn't work, you may need to replace the faulty component(s)..

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

at some point you'll get sufficiently horny that your gaze starts lingering on the crimping tool's slot, at that point it won't be long until this ceases being a problem.

[–] TriflingToad 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

does anyone happen to have that one greentext of that guy getting turned on by motherboards?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

My inspiration for this post comes from someone on Reddit who as getting horny in math class because of sin graphs. They are just so curvey

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Only work on token rings.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Unfortunately there's nothing you can do to stop the horns. I did learn from this documentary called Hellboy that you can control them with regular grinding.