this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2024
730 points (98.5% liked)
196
16708 readers
2164 users here now
Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.
Rule: You must post before you leave.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
It's sad that satire like this isn't obvious anymore. 100 bucks over 5 years should have been a giveaway, but linkedinlunatics is a thing, so.
Conversely, this also means you value your honor that little.
You do this to me once, shame on you. You do this to me twice, I'm on to you douchebag and I won't bring it up but I'll avoid situations where I pay for you or I'll just tell you it cost £2 more than it does.
I always throw an extra buck onto whatever I owe someone - try this instead. It will make them smile and its a sign of appreciation for covering my cost even if only momentarily. I've found that when I'm paying for multiple people and then trying to collect up, it's not uncommon to get screwed over a bit or not have a fee or a tip or something covered. Be the guy that goes out of the way to show some appreciation. I've probably lost $100 over the past 5 years doing this, but I have enough issues to feel douchy about. I don't need something else.
this is satire.
All fair points
This guy is a parody account in case you didn't know btw
one can phrase it like this for the terminally finance brained: an investment in friends and community is the best investment you can make; humans need other humans to be happy, and a strong community will get through basically anything alive.
When somene pays for me, I dont quibble about splitting it even. I use it as a bench mark, but I assume somsone else wont pay.
Also I know theres times I've screwed up and didn't give the fair amount (moatly due to not thinking or being aware of costs), so I try to bump it up and do a bit extra from now on.
few people know this but there is actually quite a lot of money to be made from scamming your friends
There's an entire MLM industry built upon it!
Friends? I prefer the term 'rubes'
“friends”? you mean “potential customers”.
That moment when you Capitalism your social group.
There aren’t many good reasons to ghost someone but you do bring up a good one.
yeah, always round up. owe 17.89? you send $20 and call it interest for covering for you to begin with.
This guy definitely fucks
...his "friends" over.
They obviously do not have any German friends
Am German, can confirm that I am not friends with this person.
I absolutely call out inaccuracies like this.
Am I German? 👀
You might be. Germans will sometimes fight over cents for the sake of principle.
dunno if germany has this but in sweden we have the tradition that knives cannot be gifted, you must always pay a token amount lest the knife "cut" your relationship.
Not anymore
I'm getting Ass Pennies energy
In the US Air Force they use US currency at all overseas facilities and shops on the base. But they don't ship pennies because it's not worth the cost, so they round up or down to the nearest 5. I worked with a guy who was so cheap that when it would round down he would pay with cash and when it would round up he would write a check (this was before debit cards, yes I'm that old).
5c is our smallest coin in Australia so all transactions work this way.
If I have to use up some cash at a self serve machine but I don't have enough to cover the whole thing, when I do the debit card portion of my split payment I make sure to leave 2c extra.
So if it's $12 and I have to use up a $5 note I'll split pay $6.98 on my debit, the machine will ask for the other $5.02 and will round down when I put in the $5 note.
No I don't actually care about the 2c but I'm having to type in a split pay number regardless so figure why not.
hilariously this is just how things are in all of sweden, we got rid of our equivalent to the penny and now it only remains in a vestigial decimal at the end of prices.
i have no fucking clue why we don't just force all costs to be rounded to the actual smallest unit of currency, all it does is allow people to set dumb prices like 14.95
That's how it works everywhere here. But no one uses cash and all use card/contactless.
wow, that's just awful
Don't worry, it is a joke account.
Is Ken Cheng the new Ken M?
He's the Ken M of linked in
God I feel like some people really are like this and wonder why they don't have any friends who are actually decent people.
Save some pence for the rest of us, bezos.
This reminds me of LinkedIn lunatics. Funny
Sounds like a cover story for someone with dyslexia tbh
Dyslexia doesnt exist
It was just a cover so people can steal fractions of dollars from other people "by accident"
Ah yes, crabs in a bucket, doing yet another of the capitalist's jobs for them.. 🙄
I think he's joking
I don't use LinkedIn. But most of the screenshots I see of posts on linkedin on other platforms are stuff like this.