Dress well to show respect for the court.
this post was submitted on 10 Oct 2024
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Find out what level offense this is in your state. Likely is not a crime (misdemeanor or felony) but a violation for the first offense.
If it is a misdemeanor, get a public defender and ask for a plea to a lesser charge.
There is likely a standard plea offer for all similarly situated charges/defendants. It may change depending on whether you have renewed your license. If that’s the case you can ask for additional time to renew. That will buy you another court date but give you a chance to get a better resolution if you fix the issue.
Dress like you would for church or a job interview.
Make sure your cellphone is on silent (and if you think it could ring by accident just turn your phone off when in court)
*The process in your local area will vary
Ok, here's what you do. Basic step 1, and I can't believe I even have to say this.......but you GOTTA show up 45 minutes late, and completely wasted. Wearing clothes that have been worn daily for years, but never once washed.
Then, you INSIST there's no drugs in your system, and you'll give them a free urine sample right now! That's when you whip out your cock, and power wash the judges face with your urine from 10 feet away.
Next.....you need to INSIST you know the legal proceedings of a court better than the judge, the baliff, the cops in the courthouse, any public defenders or lawyers in attendance. YOU get to tell THEM what to do. Rememer, you're entitled to everything you demand. They'll respect you so much more for knowing how these things work. You'd be surprised how many disrespectful assholes show up in a suit, with combed hair, and brushed teeth, totally sober! It's a disgrace that they would accept responsibility by saying they made a mistake, and plead no contest. How do they expect to have anal sex with the judge, and super models, and do cocaine, when there's no reason for them to fear you. That's how the world works!
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If you don't know what to do currently, just plead not guilty. For a traffic ticket they'll schedule a bench trial. This gives you some more time to work things out. Talking to a public defender can help but also talking to the prosecutor can help too. They want things to be quick and easy. If they think you might try to actually fight it, they'll try to appease you with less of a punishment or even none at all. One time I had a speeding ticket dismissed and no points on my license if I plead guilty to careless driving and paid the fine.
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