this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2024
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Hi all

It's quite common for people with adhd (and autism) to have problems with executive functioning and working memory. Which can influence a bunch of things like being able to follow steps, remembering where you left things, being able to follow a conversation, concentrating on some task, etc...

I've been diagnosed for both (autism more recently) and got to know that based on the tests of my assessment that my working memory is quite heavily impaired, but the rest of my mind works quite normal.

In day to day life, this can be rather bothersome, but I usually find some way to deal with it. But when sick, or when I had a bad sleep, suddenly I become almost incapable of basic tasks. Unable to prepare food, make appointments, or work in any way.

It's quite normal that this impacts your working memory in a negative way. (Even for neurotypicals, it's the same). But there seems to be this threshold where things become almost impossible. Where you start forgetting things you have to do only moments later.

I'm looking for ways to cope with these moments. Obviously when sick, you need rest, and eat enough. So I'm not looking to force myself to be able to work while sick. But sometimes it's so bad that I even forget to rest, forget how to cook, forget how to order food online, forget how to take care of myself. Which usually results in me being sick and worse off for a much longer time.

Things I've found that help me:

  • Meditation (Incredibly difficult when sick, but every bit seems to help)
  • Medication (ADHD meds seem to help a bit, if I'm using them at the moment, I seem to feel much better, even when it's mostly physical discomfort. )
  • Committing skills/knowledge to long-term memory (This is difficult because usually it requires extra time and calm moments where you can focus on it. It helped me a lot for cooking. Practicing the basics makes it much easier to get cooking even if I feel terrible)

Any other suggestions as to what might be good ways to improve working memory and make sure that I stay functional to make sure I can take care of myself?

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Cook up a huge pot of soup and then put it in meal-sized containers in the freezer. Don't touch them unless things get real bad, then defrost one and eat it.

I did this when I knew I'd been exposed to covid. 3 days later I was sick AF, my brain was complete mush yet I was nomming on soup.

[–] NationProtons 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Thanks. Any good recipes you recommend?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I'm sure there's lots on youtube. Basically just chop up lots of vegetables and then boil them in chicken stock until soft enough to mash. Pumpkin, potatoes, leeks, diced bacon ends to start with but whatever's in the fridge. Once it's in your bowl grate cheese on top and dip buttered toast into it.

[–] NationProtons 1 points 2 months ago

That sounds pretty good actually.

I also find that online, there are so many 'recipes' which ask for specific ingredients and spices. But when I don't have one of those ingredients, I'm not good at substituting (definitely not when sick and not thinking straight)

Instead, I would like to have some guidelines for cooking. Where they just show you some general steps, like 1. grab 3 vegetables from your and cook them in a pot in this way. Then fry a protein in this way. And boom, there is a meal.

I'm getting better at this already, but improvising can be difficult sometimes when you have to think too much.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

if you havent nerded out about external brains, I think the best designed ones like Logseq for example work wonderful as a basic thinking and memory recall tool for those really hard days.

https://logseq.com/

Dont get complicated with it (outside of riding any hyperfocus waves when/if they come of course), on those tough days it is sometimes no more than a tool to remind yourself what you were trying to do.

These tools werent intended as executive dysfunction treatment tools (in a weird way they are sort of designed for people with very executive function capable brains ) but the laser like focus on clarity, speed of thought, and ease of information recall with minimal UI distractions is a fucking lifesaver for executive dysfunction brains like mine.

Try out pulling up the daily journal on those hard days and just start writing what is on your mind. Maybe it turns into a list, maybe a way to vent and describe how it hurts so much to feel stuck, maybe it becomes an exciting idea that helps motivate you, maybe it is just a place to bookmark a cool website you found while blobbing and that is the best you can do that day.

Tools like logseq arent really organizational tools, they are thinking tools, which makes them a lifeline on those really tough days were focusing on anything or remembering anything feels nearly impossible.

I mean it isnt a magic fix though, those days suck :(

[–] NationProtons 4 points 2 months ago

Oh yeah. The moment I discovered Obsidian, I spent like three days non-stop just making notes and creating a structure to fit my thoughts. Nowadays I take it a bit more relaxed. But it's still great to keep track of projects and administrative things.

I even just link pdfs with invoices, bills, etc... in my notes, so I never have to search in folders on my computer. Just search for the 'electricity' note, and there are my energy bills. Very handy.

The only disadvantage I've found with digital notetaking is that it's not really visible unless you check it (or remind yourself somehow to check it) For example I have a note with a FAQ for myself to check when I feel bad and the common ways I found that help me. But I never remember to check this note when I'm really sick.

Also just having to open my laptop or phone to write/read notes is a moment of potential distraction. Computers and phones can be used for so much more, and when I'm not feeling good it's easy to get dragged into distractions like reading articles online or playing games, watching videos.

So I would say during the somewhat bad days, these tools help me a lot. But during the real bad days, they are actually more difficult for me to use as intended.

Instead, I now just keep a pocketable notebook with my tasks for the day, and calendar with my appointments. It's faster for writing something down quickly and more flexible. And it also keeps my todo list manageable, because there is a limit as to how much space I have for each day.

For projects, references and administration, I still put everything inside obsidian though. Usually prompted by a note in my pocket notebook.