this post was submitted on 28 Apr 2024
797 points (98.7% liked)

Humor

7494 readers
4 users here now

"Laugh-a-Palooza: Unleash Your Inner Chuckle!"

Rules


Read Full Rules Here!


Rule 1: Keep it light-hearted. This community is dedicated to humor and laughter, so let’s keep the tone light and positive.


Rule 2: Respectful Engagement. Keep it civil!


Rule 3: No spamming!


Rule 4: No explicit or NSFW content.


Rule 5: Stay on topic. Keep your posts relevant to humor-related topics.


Rule 6: Moderators Discretion. The moderators retain the right to remove any content, ban users/bots if deemed necessary.


Please report any violation of rules!


Warning: Strict compliance with all the rules is imperative. Failure to read and adhere to them will not be tolerated. Violations may result in immediate removal of your content and a permanent ban from the community.


We retain the discretion to modify the rules as we deem necessary.


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 31 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 46 points 7 months ago (3 children)

But you wouldn't be sand, you would be ash. And that would make for a shitty hourglass.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

So you can continue to be shitty in family game night! Don't you also want to continue to cause disagreements and conflicts between family members?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Don't let my family know, I still want to keep ruining speed Monopoly...

But I wouldn't object if my ashes are like, 85% sand by volume. I'd be too dead.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

"Filtered Promethiel"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Maybe you could mix the ashes with clay, have it fired and then grind or crush the ceramic into sand.

[–] FellowEnt 4 points 7 months ago

It would definitely need some processing. Bit of Fumed Silica might also help to make it free-flowing.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 7 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Had the same business idea when I saw this post.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They are one drunk night idea away from making a key chain

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

They make a charm-bracelet sized one that could easily fit on a keychain

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

A fucking neckless? Damn! You could gift it grandma before the time is up.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

We’re all neckless after being cremated.

But if we end up on a necklace, does that make it ironic?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

"Lifetime warranty"

Hopefully for the living relatives

[–] [email protected] 23 points 7 months ago (2 children)

What if I get cremated before I die?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago

Then you get to participate in game night and be a disturbing anecdote.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

I mean.. not MUCH before

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago (1 children)

put my ashes in a snow globe.

Please, i think it would be funny.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

you say that like it would even be noticeable. You would probably just think it's a weird nuclear fallout snowglobe type thing, until you flipped it over and looked at the bottom. Or dropped it.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago (3 children)

That would be one MASSIVE hourglass that would last multiple hours 💀

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The great Familial Hourglass that contains generations and generations of ashes

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Different-length hourglasses for different people. Grandfather over there is a 3-hours, but if you don't eat your cornflakes, Timmy, you're only going to be a 3-minutes!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

That's dreadful; I love it

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

And if you stuck a dagger in it it would cause everyone to turn into sand zombies.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

not that big with water cremation I think. still quite big. it doesnt have any box ash with you. or you could make plenty of lityle ones for the whole extended family

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

Can't tell if gruesome or wholesome :S

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

Reminds me of a comic where Chaos Spacemarines from different factions are holding a meeting and the Tzeentch marine never shows up so the Khorne marine screams "HES PLAYING US LIKE A GODDAMN FIDDLE" but the real meta joke is that the Tzeentch marine is there, he's the sand in the hourglass.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Yoo new business idea for my parents. they can sell "luxury" hourglasses with my ashes.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Or a stepping stone! I wanna be a stepping stone! You can mix ashes into concrete and it makes it stronger depending on the amount.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Dad's last pranks: the eggs are too hard

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Well, now I'm sad. Thanks.