this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2024
472 points (97.8% liked)

Funny: Home of the Haha

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🎡What do you get, when you never diet? 🎡 (lemmy.world)
submitted 4 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
16 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 
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[–] [email protected] 47 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Ooompa loompa doompity do, eat more fiber or die during a poo.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I eat a lot of fiber and I just know I'm going out like Elvis

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

I eat lots of poo and you're not getting enough fiber

[–] [email protected] 30 points 4 months ago

What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?

Eating as much as an elephant eats?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

Oom-pa, loom-pa! Doop-a-dee dest.

She, was, rea-lly de-pressed.

Oom-pa, loom-pa! Doop-a-dee dist!

Should-ah, gone-to, see-a the-ra-ah-pist!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

rea-lly

I want you to know that read this like Ace Ventura to make the cadence work.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

I know it's a bit of a joke considering the post but I hope you're ok. Just in case it's not joke, if you need a hand getting to a therapist or just to vent I'm here to listen.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I want this, but since I'm hiring them, I want them to sing a song implying I was secretly an international man of mystery.

Oompa loompa doopity dater What do you get when you kill a dictator

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I'd tell them to do that and they'd just be like:

Oompa loompa doompity dater
What do you get as a chronic masturbater.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Oompa loompa doopity dorn

On your dick you've grown a corn

Oompa loompa doppity dock

You'll get cut from that crusty sock

Oompa loompa diggity dod

Every day you grow further from God

I don't like the smell of it

[–] Assman 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Grunka lunka dunkety darmed guards..

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Watched that episode yesterday.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

Oompa loompa doopity dee Should have been born with better genes

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

What would you do when jackin kills you?

Oompa, loompa, doopity do.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

This but the 2005 version.