this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2023

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Despite having two bullets in her, one eye and a slightly wonky rear leg, she will steal your pizza without a hitch (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 111 points 2 years ago (5 children)

Meet Wen the pizza thief.

This adorable goofball grew up on the streets where she lost an eye, lost a bit of movement in one of her hind legs and was shot twice before being patched up by an animal hospital and adopted by my housemate.

To the person that shot her twice, I wish you stub your toe.

And die.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

Bro who shoots a cat? There's a special place in hell for those people.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

I worked for a guy in Oklahoma City he did.

Biggest asshole I ever worked for. Made the Jewish chick work Christmas, when everyone else was home, because she asked for a Jewish holiday off.

[–] TheRealLinga 6 points 2 years ago

When I was young (10-12) we had a family cat named Simba. Short haired. Super cool cat. We lived in the middle of nowhere so Simba would roam the countryside like... well... Simba!

That is, until he came home one day with a bullet hole in his tail. Luckily his tail was saved, but on the upside we moved after that AND it was pretty hilarious to my 10 year old self to watch him walk around with a cast on his tail.

Poor kitty. He lived a full, happy life. I miss him

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Won't let me delete.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Who would do such a horrible thing to a lovely pizza thief like Wen?!

Sending loads of love!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

"thank u fren" – Wen

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

To the person that shot her twice, I wish you stub your toe. And die.

They deserve a trip on an Oceangate sub, nom sayin?
Maybe they can ride down together with the Google engineers and PMs trying to push WEI.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

That would actually be a far quicker death than what they deserve

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

That would actually be a far quicker death than what they deserve

Hit 'em with a little Slo-mo first.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago (2 children)

She can have my slice. No need to steal it. 🥹

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago (1 children)

It's not as good without the crime tho.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 years ago

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago

Slice?

She's a criminal mastermind. She's going for the entire pie.

[–] ClutchCargo 1 points 2 years ago

At first I was like: “stubbing a toe is too light a punishment”, then I was like: “ah… yes”

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 years ago

Lost an eye, broke (maybe) a leg and got shot twice. That's only four out of nine lives. If all that didn't even bring her down to 50% hp, ain't nothing gonna stop her from taking your pizza!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

Poor kitty. She's adorable

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago

A true pirate Captain! Take what you want, give nothing back! Yaarrrrr!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago

What a good girl ❤️ She deserves all the pizza she wants

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

She gets all the pizza she wants but if it’s more fun for her to steal it, then I’ll play along

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

I love Wen and I hope she has all the pizza she could ever want

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Reminds me of my last cat, Wednesday. She also only had one eye and her paperwork from the SPCA said "her jaw is misaligned, possibly from being hit by a car."

She was the sweetest girl ever. I miss her.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

❤️

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

She is beautiful! I hope she gets all the pizza she wants.

[+] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (2 children)

[deleted]

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

Don't know when (heh) she was shot and how long after she was treated by the animal hospital. It's been many years. If the animal hospital didn't remove them, it's probably because they thought it would be dangerous to do so.

Thankfully for her, it does not affect her pizza thievery.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Yep, it’s often worse to try to remove them when they’re old and healed. My Emma had been a street cat, and the vet discovered an old, healed pellet in her side during an X-ray. They said it was best to leave it.

Wen is an adorable criminal!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Was she shot with a BB gun, pellet gun, or an actual firearm?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

I do not have the specifics unfortunately. The documentation my housemate showed me only says that she "had been shot twice, with the bullets remaining in her."

Putting some thought into this, it does seem more likely that she was shot twice with a BB/pellet gun rather than an actual firearm.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

If they've been there a while they might be more dangerous to remove

[–] CapnAssHolo 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Is that Jack Bauer

[–] Aurenkin 1 points 2 years ago

I believe that is Jack Meower

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