this post was submitted on 05 Mar 2024
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So I've realized that in conversations I'll use traditional terms for men as general terms for all genders, both singularly and for groups. I always mean it well, but I've been thinking that it's not as inclusive to women/trans people.

For example I would say:

"What's up guys?" "How's it going man?" "Good job, my dude!” etc.

Replacing these terms with person, people, etc sounds awkward. Y'all works but sounds very southern US (nowhere near where I am located) so it sounds out of place.

So what are some better options?

Edit: thanks for all the answers peoples, I appreciate the honest ones and some of the funny ones.

The simplest approach is to just drop the usage of guys, man, etc. Folks for groups and mate for singular appeal to me when I do want to add one in between friends.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I just omit the unnecessary words or use their name. That works OK, although I'm awful with names so usually it just becomes "Good job!" or "What's up?".

Funny story time: in English I find this is not so bad. In French it's worse. In Vietnamese it's awful. We have dozens of pronouns. They're not only mostly gendered, but contain information about their age and perceived status relative to you. It's a 3-dimensional matrix where the axes are approximately gender, age/hierarchy, and degree of relation (inlaws/blood relations/strangers). You even get a different word for yourself in some of these situations. Then sometimes there's a numerical rank inside each pronoun e.g. male uncle, my spouse's family, 3rd oldest.

The language is already at maximum pronoun burden. Honestly it would just be easier if we called each other 'human' or 'comrade' or 'citizen' or something equally encompassing. It's exhausting as a non-native speaker (and you are not ever allowed to use their names, that's considered super rude).

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

My go-to is folks, but 1000 others have mentioned that already. So I will throw in "people".

"Hey people, how's it going?"

That works for me

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

What's poppin primatesβ€½β€½β€½

[–] BudgetBandit 10 points 8 months ago

"Gentels and Ladymenβ€œ

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

"Mate" is always a good option, I wish it's used more universally in the States, too.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Folks for groups and friend for individuals is my go to. Comrade if you want to be spicy

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago

"What's up dog turds?"

"How's it hanging, dingleberry?"

"Nice job, Captain Hazelwood!"

I do actually know someone who speaks like this.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I've started using "hello chums"

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

I sound even more southern than I am because I say "y'all" frequently to avoid gendered pronouns. People, you, and we are often good. I think my favorite is "you folks".

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

all friends everyone folks peeps team

If you're only addressing one person then it can be left off entirely.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

dawg, home skillet, my glip glops, folks,
hydrogenated oil

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You can't say glip-glop! That's their word!

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Whenever there's any question, I usually open with "sup, dogs" in my most serious voice, then continue to deadpan refer to everyone as dog, such as "and you, dog, I need to check the grist mill, thank you dog". Fifteen years in and no complaints so far.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

i find myself using "friend" a lot lately. dunno if that's a great replacement.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

I'm not your buddy, guy!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

What's up carbon based earthlings.

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