this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2024
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[–] [email protected] 144 points 7 months ago (2 children)

The police went to apprehend the female suspects at a private house in Yalta but were surprised to find them "well armed" and "well prepared," the post said.

You are surprised that two resistance fighters who risked their lives to kill the invaders were prepared for shit to get hot?...

[–] [email protected] 68 points 7 months ago

"My lord, someone has empowered the womenfolk!" - Crimean Police

[–] [email protected] 16 points 7 months ago

Hopefully they confiscated any vodka they found at the house

[–] [email protected] 88 points 7 months ago (27 children)

You GO, girls!

The free world admires your efforts!

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[–] [email protected] 53 points 7 months ago (4 children)

They took out 3 cops and injured 2 it says

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 7 months ago

Godspeed ladies!

[–] [email protected] 36 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They just eat and drink the stuff some random people they just made war against brought them. Smert!

[–] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago

When your own country gives you expired rations, just about anything else looks appealing.

[–] ALERT 34 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I am an unmarried Ukrainian and I need names!

[–] PsychedSy 16 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I'm down if one wants US citizenship.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Mysteriously dies after 5 years of being married

[–] PsychedSy 6 points 7 months ago

That's kind of the point. Well. Close. Having people rely on me keeps me going. I've always liked the idea of helping other people immigrate.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Sounds like they have a thing for strong women, unlike you....

[–] MajorSauce 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Maybe he was referring to their proficiency in poisoning...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Maybe that's what makes him interested...

[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago

This is the best summary I could come up with:


Ukrainian saboteurs who are alleged to have poisoned and killed 46 Russian soldiers are on the run in annexed Crimea after a shoot-out with police, a local report says.

Two young saboteurs who had poisoned members of the Russian military in Simferopol and Bakhchisarai fled when authorities attempted to detain them in Crimea, Telegram channel Kremlin Snuffbox said on Tuesday.

It was reported in December that members of a Ukrainian partisan group called Crimean Combat Seagulls poisoned and killed 24 Russian soldiers after lacing their vodka with arsenic and strychnine.

At the time, Snuffbox quoted unnamed sources as saying that "two nice girls" tricked the unit in Simferopol, Crimea, into drinking the vodka, per the Kyiv Post translation.

In another incident, saboteurs killed 18 and hospitalized 14 Russian personnel in Bakhchisarai, Crimea, by putting arsenic and rat poison in pies and beer, Kremlin Snuffbox previously reported.

Russian military personnel stationed in Crimea have been asked not to take any food or any drinks from strangers and to detain any suspicious young women who approach them to prevent further incidents of poisoning,


The original article contains 314 words, the summary contains 181 words. Saved 42%. I'm a bot and I'm open source!

[–] [email protected] 23 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago (10 children)
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Can't decide if Crimean Combat Seagulls or Kremlin Snuffbox should be the name of the screenplay (or my new band name)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Fields of ditch meat become fields of sunflowers one day. And once they've been cleared of all the submunitions, the crops will be glorious.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago

I think I watched this episode of Handmaid's Tale

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Crimean Combat Seagulls had me actually chortling.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

Seagulls can be very mean

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I'm sure there's got to be a Ukrainian equivalent to 'Allo 'Allo!, only it's Slavic and brutal as fuck.

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