this post was submitted on 05 Mar 2024
807 points (98.8% liked)

Greentext

4460 readers
566 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

>Volcano erupts in Indonesia
>Locals don't notice because they have shit weather radar
>747 flies through the dust cloud
>All 4 engines get filled with volcanic ash and burn out
>"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress."
>Spend 12 minutes gliding, dropping 23,500 feet in the process
>The pilots are preparing to be the first 747 ever to attempt a water landing
>Finally one of the engines restarts
>But ILS is offline
>Windscreen is completely opaque due to ash, no way to clean it
>Manage to land running entirely on instruments
>Fatalities: 0
>Injuries: 0
Survivors: 263

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I literally cannot tell the difference.

Source: am manager, and sometimes my underlings don't toil hard enough in the PowerPoint mines.

You should mercilessly berate them until morale improves, that's MBA 101.

You're gonna be back in the PowerPoint mines if you don't fix your soft-hearted attitude.