this post was submitted on 02 Mar 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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I WFH, every year one of the goals that the rest of the team decides is that it's "so great" to see each other in person. The past few years haven't worked out but one did. I spent hours in a couple of airports, the huge expense for the company, I spent days away from my family, and for what? So you could look me in my same face you would see if we turned cameras on every once in a while? My husband says I'm being weird, but I legitimately want to know, what is the benefit? I hate being there and have to play nice so you can.....look me even closer in the face?

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[โ€“] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago (22 children)

look me in my same face you would see if we turned cameras on every once in a while?

Not the same as interpersonal interaction, misses much of the communication we evolved to express and understand.

OTOH, I've had a few Zoom-only relationships where we're pretty tight, but that's rare.

LOL, one of those is my Zoom rep. We email occasionally, trade pics and jokes. Every few months we Zoom and shoot the bullshit about our lives. She gets me the skinny on upcoming stuff, where my account's at, what I might need or not need. Because we're tight like that, she jumps when I need a thing, and in turn, I read all her correspondence carefully.

Another is a coworker, nearly my best friend at the company. When we finally met in person at a team meeting, we were tight. Boss was like, "Had you guys met before today?!"

Again, pretty rare relationships. Know who I'm really close to? The guy who lives here who I used to work in the office with. Man came to my wedding. None of those remote people did. When he needs my help, I jump.

And if anyone wants to poo-poo interpersonal work relationships, I will ask that person what they think of long-distance relationships. The conventional wisdom is that they don't work out. (Yes, I know those are different. But how different and why? Think on that.)

Great post and question! Much food for thought as we navigate this new world.

Anyway, I had some thoughts earlier tonight, both pro and con.

https://old.lemmy.world/comment/8056815

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I've worked retail, office jobs, call center jobs and warehouse jobs. I made an office 'friend' in two of those jobs. One who id grab drinks with outside of work and another who id chat to via text occasionally. But as our jobs changed and lives moved on. So did we.

I don't feel the need to be forced into social situations, people are tiring and there's better things I could spend my time on that being shoved into a room with co-works who I have no interest in talking to and have no interest in talking to me.

Both my best friends are long distance friends. I've known one for 13 years, we've met up once. And one for 9 years who I've never met in person. And they're the best friends I've ever had. If they have issues, I'm right there via text or call to help. Same if I have issues. We send eachother gifts for birthdays/ Christmas, or just because. The 9 year friend and I do a book trade and recommend eachother things we think the other would like (not just book recommendations).

My partner and I have been together for almost 2 years now, we live in different countries. And it's honestly the best relationship I've ever had. Not because of the distance, we visit eachother multiple times a year. But the distance also isn't an issue.

So long distance friendships/ relationships can work.

Just because some people need that face to face interaction, doesn't mean everyone else does. Especially when it's forced by a workplace. If it was to meet up with a friend, I'm sure it would be more welcomed. But being made to meet up with co-workers who aren't friends/ close with, that sounds miserable. Being made to do something you don't want to do/ aren't interested in is never fun. Ever try get a teenager to clean their room? Often not very high on their list because it's something they don't want to do. The same can be said for social events with co-workers for a lot of people.

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