this post was submitted on 06 Feb 2024
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Asklemmy
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I'll list some hobbies at the end but for me, I struggled feeling motivated after work to do anything but eat and be entertained. It got pretty bad until I decided I needed to figure out something different. I thought I was just missing hobbies but even as I picked some hobbies up (usually on weekends) I wouldn't do them during the week.
Most of my issues revolved around stress (from work), turns out.
I still struggle with this so don't expect a magic solution, but what I found was that my job was actually a lot more stressful than I thought. To the point where I'd wake up in the night thinking about work problems that for sure weren't a big deal and that for sure wouldn't be solved half asleep. So now I try and be more productive at work to make sure I avoid deadlines getting tight, and towards the end of the day I make sure my tasks are simple, if possible. I also try and take lots of breaks and I check in with myself "am I relaxed right now?" "would a break make me more productive" - and I unfortunately found that media isn't a good break for me at work. Somehow the stress stays, while also adding in cravings for more dopamine-inducing activities. Good breaks for me include walking, actively listening to music, daydreaming, planning stuff (holidays, dinner, my upcoming evening, weekend), reading (pretty much anything), and learning new stuff (I'm studying Spanish and chess right now, recently learned all of my PLL algorithms on a Rubik's Cube). I'm a software engineer for context.
The largest stress benefit for me has been biking to work. Yeah, I almost get ran over sometimes which is scary (even with bike paths 90% of my route, you still gotta cross roads, and even with a walk sign cars still won't see you), but driving during rush hour is stressful (there are studies on this but I'm too lazy to link any). Biking is just fun. I even bike in winter (studded tires and poggies/bar mits). Since not everyone has the luxury of biking, exercising immediately after work is something to consider. It for sure helps me separate work from home. There's plenty of studies on exercise lowering stress.
And if your job isn't too stressful, there's another issues with not committing to hobbies... For me, it was that I was/am addicted to media. Once I get started with some dinner and YouTube, it's hard not to lose a couple hours. Best advice for easing out of it is audiobooks make it easy after eating to do chores/walk/not get more food. But other than audiobooks, avoid consuming media while eating. Also avoid media served by an algorithm. It's so easy to watch a great video, and refresh the recommendations to look for another. Then you're watching sub-par videos just hoping for a good one... Wasting tons of time. I use an extension to hide video recommendations. I can still search, and browse my subscriptions, but it saves me a lot of time (extension is called unhook I believe).
My username is actually centered around the idea that the more passive an activity, the less valuable it is to you. I personally want more active hobbies in my life. It is weird to me that so many fulfilling hobbies exist, but I regularly waste evenings on YouTube...
If you can have low stress and minimal cravings for YT/Netflix, here's some hobbies:
Adventure is out there. Don't waste your youth. Some of these might not seem like ideal after work hobbies, but most are totally doable in an evening.
Forgot to mention that slow-living or whatever you want to call it is valuable. Just spend a while doing nothing. Thinking. Chatting with a friend. Be bored. You'll probably knock out some chores, and get really motivated to do something big (humans do not like being bored)
Edit: gonna put more hobbies I think of here
Thanks for the amazing lists of other things to do. I've got to agree that any form of exercise is the best alternative! Are you up for sharing your dumb games with us? I'd love to have a go!
Kinda hesitant to share because the URL's are the names of my family members (kinda a gift to them, kinda me just holding on to the domain names in case they want them someday). But they're definitely not impressive. One of them I'd like to spend some time to make more fun, but as it is now, it's mostly a gimmick (zombies walk towards you and you walk away - 2d, score is just how many seconds you can avoid getting touched). Pretty rewarding weekend project though, and you can easily show it off
Ah, that's understandable, we don't want Uncle Jim doxxed over the zombie game.
This is amaziiiing. Such a great response! Thank you, I recognize a lot! I will go running right after finishing this comment ;) Will also definitely try the audio books to get unhooked while eating.
Happy to share! And glad you found value in it
Thank you for taking the time to write this up. It's very inspiring and I have some ideas to try
Thanks for sharing, I think a lot of people can relate to feeling unmotivated to do their hobbies after work. I read a blog post recently (struggling to find the link) that paradoxically feeling too tired for hobbies after work can be a vicious cycle, and you're better off trying the hobbies anyway to increase your motivation for doing them. That's really helped me with a game I'm working on. When I can't work on it for a while, I lose motivation. But once I make some small progress each day, I feel motivated to keep working on it.
I can definitely relate to this. It seems like even a little time with a hobby has a large impact on my evening. Sometimes I'll do something a little hard like studying Spanish for a few minutes, which leads to guitar and then chess and then I feel more accomplished come bed time. Some how makes me feel more recovered from work