this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2024
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HP CEO: You're 'bad investment' if you don't buy HP supplies (www.theregister.com)
submitted 9 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[–] [email protected] 51 points 9 months ago (3 children)

we sort of see a 20 percent uplift on the value of that customer because you're locking that person, committing to a longer-term relationship.

Do these people never listen to themselves? Who the hell wants to be "locked"?

[–] [email protected] 37 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

CEO: "We have observed through careful analysis that by locking our customers inside the restaurant, they will continue to order food from us in order to not starve. Therefore, from now on, all doors shall now be one way only"

Investors: "What brilliant entrepreneurship!"