this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2024
936 points (96.4% liked)

Greentext

4482 readers
1366 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

drop your childhood stories:
>be me, age 12
>hate showering more than anything
>it feels gross and i hate getting wet
>my mom starts telling me that if i don't shower every day then i can't eat dinner
>i want my dindin so i come up with a genius plan
>let the shower run for 10-15 minutes while i sit in the bathroom
>quickly wet my hair with sink
>mom buys it, i get dindin
>after a month she gets suspicious
>realize i have to step up my game
>now i run the shower and rub my arms/neck with hand soap
>also run my hair under the shower so it's dripping wet and not just moist
>she asks why i haven't asked her to buy shampoo yet
>come up with final version of my genius plan
>i'll stand next to the shower, let the water run, rub soap on my whole body and also use shampoo on my hair so it smells like shampoo
>then i'll rinse off in the sink
>all while the shower runs

i did this for four years until i realized i was just showering on hard mode

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I'm just waiting Americans to come in and tell that actually that's just Houston style pizza or some shit and it's supposed to be like that (also it's a cube, don't worry about it)

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Houston lobbied for the FDA to permit the addition of glass shards to pizza dough as a bulking agent. What doesn't kill your teeth and internal organs can only make you stronger!