this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2023
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pops the golden parachute
"Later, bitches!"
"So, board of directors, you can force me to do any dumb thing you want, or fire me for not doing it? Yeah. Imma need an escape shuttle."
"Fine. We'll cut you a check for a couple of million if it comes to that. But we're so smart, it won't come to that."
"It came to that."
"Here's your check."
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Maybe the solution for CEOs that take the golden parachute is a literal golden parachute.
Abd what would you propose we do with the board of directors? Ya know, the people actually running the show?
Y'all are suckers. They put out a Judas goat and you eat it up.
No one's saying they can't also be dropped from a plane while strapped to a heavy weight. Planes are big, there's room for CEOs and boards, and anyone else who promotes enshittification. 🤷♂️
The solution is to tax the rich so a golden parachute mostly goes to the tax payer. Including stock options.
Times are tough, best we can do is lead.
They get a rucksack filled with gold bullion, and the only way out of the building is through the window of their corner office.