this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2023
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Asklemmy
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I've completely given up on finding someone to spend my life with. I'm 27m and I have nothing to offer outside of love. Every girl I'm even slightly attracted to already has a boyfriend. I'm not unattractive but I have resting bitch face and I'm intimidating. I've lived my whole life with people being afraid of me which fuels my need for companionship. I know I'm not owed anything from anyone but that doesn't mean that it doesn't still hurt.
Anymore I've just accepted that I'm going to die alone because I'm only going to be wanted for what I can provide when I just want to be fucking loved. My own family doesn't even love me. All they can talk about is how I'm not good enough or I'm not applying myself correctly.
I hate being a man..
I feel you, man.
I'm 29 and in your same exact situation. I'm constantly reminded that I'm alone and the world isn't made for single men. The harder I try the stronger the depression hits back since all my efforts are meaningless. And each time I talk to someone about it I just get the most cliche responses.
I've just completely given up on love and accepted that I'll be alone the rest of my life. Since it looks like it won't be better, at least I don't want it to be worse...
I was like you at that age, it stinks to feel unlovable, it's the loneliest feeling ever.
That said I quit my job, went back to uni and finished something i should have long time ago. In that process I met my current wife, at 37.
So never give up hope. Instead of investing time in others, try learning to love yourself a bit more. If you don't approach every woman as a potential mate but just as a person it gets better, too.
I know it's easy to say from where I am right now, but best of luck and much strenght, bro!
I understand the feeling. I'm sure you have lots to offer even if you don't know about it yet ;)
I agree with Akasazh. I met my first partner at 24 and it lasted 7 years before we realized it would be better to split. It took me a long time (4 years) to find someone else, at age 36. Age doesn't matter: people find love even past 70! (my grandma!)
This channel offered me good advices and helped me a lot. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClHVl2N3jPEbkNJVx-ItQIQ It's much smarter than the usual youtube dating advices.
Yeah man wtf why is it that it feels like EVERY SINGLE GIRL not only already has a boyfriend but there's like twenty other guys in line ahead of you? How does that math work out when the population is roughly 50/50?