this post was submitted on 07 May 2025
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Shitty Food Porn
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ftfy
You’re as bad as the chauffeur, who – directly after my wedding ceremony – said “You still have 24 hours to change your mind”. 🙄
Classy
It’s my fault. I should’ve picked a different chauffeur when the first time I called them and said I was getting married, and his response was “oh, a standing funeral.” 🤦♂️
Oof yeah, definitely not a good start, is there a way to sound even more divorced than that?
Lemme try:
"She caught me peeing in the sink. Again."
How'd i do?
Good start, but it's missing the open misogyny of a divorced boomer.
Something like "That bitch caught me peeing in the sink again."
Bonus points if you can make yourself sound divorced and incel at the same time.
Ok, how about:
"She bitched about me pissing in MY sink. Again. Real sigma shit."