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How can I assure myself that I can find a partner despite being chronically ill and disabled? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Every time I encounter another problem with my body that a healthy person wouldn't have, I'm always tempted to think to myself that nobody would want a partner like me because they could just pick someone healthier and more capable. I'm in my early 20s and my health is already getting a little worse each year without any real way to stop it.

I could tell myself that my unique story is compelling, and that enduring all of this hardship has cultivated a more powerful mindset than mainstream materialism and hyperindividualism, and that anyone who shares my values would appreciate me for who I am, even if it means potentially foregoing wealth and luxury. But I just wish I had something more to go off of, something a little more than just blind hope.

I know that lacking confidence and having an external locus of control aren't helping at all, but I find that I can only feel confidence and control if I have a solid, well-reasoned belief that I can succeed and my actions are meaningful.

So, I'd really appreciate any success stories, those who found love despite having challenging medical issues, or any good arguments you might have. I don't think there will be any one thing that does it for me; every little bit will help. Thank you.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

I can tell you that my ex had a lot of mental health issues when we got together. That didn't stop me because I found her interesting as a person. I think a lot of people will overlook medical issues if they find you an interesting person.

It is true that it makes it harder. Some people won't overlook them, especially if they significantly affect your day-to-day life. But I think a lot of people will overlook them, and even more so if you're someone who fits their personality.

I can't guarantee you that you will find love, but I can guarantee that the things you described will not stop you from finding love.