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this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024
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Asklemmy
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Assuming that a profile is enough to understand someone. Sure, donβt waste time/drag out meeting someone butβ¦ actually talk (video chat) and ask questions before you move things along.
Ask questions important to you and what you are looking for.
Video chat? Wtf. Have people ever heard of coffee? Very public, fairly short, no commitment. You can even say the no commitment part up front. Just meet, don't expect anything, and see how it goes.
I have a stupid question.
How do people "see how it goes" and ever have a positive experience? For me, even if the person is friendly and funny, I am so uncomfortable that I never want to do it again. Literally no one has ever felt any different for me. Even if I gain some level of pleasantness and satisfaction from the interaction, it is incredibly mild and doesn't ever make up for anything or make me wish to continue. I have tried seeing people repeatedly to no avail. The cost-benefit analysis never nets me out on top. I have always been a perpetual loner due in part to this. Does this mean I'm a psychopath or something? Because I cannot connect with and gain satisfaction from humans the way they seem to be able to with each other?
Do you experience that with people who you consider to be friends?
Yes.
But I do not experience it with my parents and I do not experience it at work.