Autism

I realise that a big part of the difficulties I experienced was because I never really took a moment to sit still and check whether what I was doing made sense. Like, is this actually what I want to do, is this even good for me? (mentally and physically)

I finally got the time to think a bit, and it made so much difference. At the beginning you still feel a lot of pressure from yourself, because obviously there is a financial part to it. But even beyond that, I noticed I always wanted to be doing something productive (Like doing exercise, making better food, learning some skill, etc.)

After a while (and doing a bit more meditation), the perspective started to shift and I started to realise that most things are much more bearable, if not even fun, when you start just taking your time, not rushing yourself, not trying to optimise everything. This applies to work, but also hobbies, like gaming and browsing the internet. Even gaming becomes stressful if you are always looking for the next goal, the next target and your start filling hours upon hours with that activity.

Talking with other people seems to put this into perspective. It's so easy to tell somebody else to not worry about something and take it easy. But then you realise that they could give that same advice to you and it would still apply. Sometimes just acting/talking towards yourself with the same concern and compassion that you show other people (even strangers) can be so helpful.