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My relationship with money is kinda weird. When I was a kid I would always save my allowance, but my siblings would steal it from me. My parents never did anything about it. When I had finally had enough, I stole some money back and then said all the bullshit excuses I had received over the years. The stealing stopped then.
I don't like money and I don't care much about material stuff. When I was in university, I was dirt poor, but I managed. Then I got a shitty job and didn't make a lot of money, but it was so much more than what I had before, that my bank account started to grow. And that made me very nervous. Every time I saw my balance I panicked. I didn't know what to do with all that money, there was nothing I really wanted or thought I could have. I did go on a vacation then, which was great, but I felt really guilty afterwards about the expenses I'd made.
After some time I lost my job and since then I've received benefits. Because of the system here and because I'm still quite frugal, I still have a significant back account. In a few months' time I will hear if I will keep receiving benefits or not, and if I spend the money now, it will be beneficial for me financially. I should basically buy something expensive and eat out and buy lots of clothes before the government takes my money, but I can't. I'm just not able to.
What doesn't help is that I hate the fact that the world is in such a miserable state. Sure, I could buy a car, but I don't need it and why would I mess up the environment even more just for my own pleasure and comfort? The same goes for clothing, equipment, furniture, anything. I don't like this capitalist system that produces crap and ruins the planet. I don't want it. But there's nothing I can do about it other than what I already do. Also, most of the stuff you can buy nowadays is just plastic crap. I can't even find decent cotton socks anymore, it's all plastic. And it all breaks way too quickly, just so you have to buy new plastic crap again. Fuck that.
Purchase some carbon reduction.
https://climeworks.com/subscriptions
These guys have giant CCS machines. When you send them money (which they use to fund their operations), they calculate what share of carbon reductions you've funded and they give you a certificate for it. It is NOT a carbon offset. They pull carbon out of the air directly and bury it in the ground.