First it starts with a comedy video which turns into this weird creepy thing about kids running through the Paris sewers, encountering an alligator, then getting rowed out and into the Seine by a ghost and it cuts to reality and all the nations are going down the river on boats past a bunch of water jets because they're not doing this in a stadium.
This looks awful and ridiculous. Compare this to the spectacle of London 2012.
Now they're doing some weird old Hollywood movie musical style musical number with Lady Gaga and she's on a staircase, which is... somewhere in Paris?
I am so fucking confused.
Edit: They just cut to Macron and he looks as confused as I am.
It'll just be 500 people firing tracer filled machine guns into the air, fireworks being launched off the deck of an aircraft carrier, and a finale centered on an ICBM being detonated offshore to the tune of America, Fuck Yeah!
That's going to depend rather heavily on who wins the next election.
With the anchors telling viewers, "This flyover is of an F-35 squadron. The program has cost almost 2 trillion. The military has stated it will be using it less going forward. NOW HERE'S BEYONCÉ!"
I was at an air show in Canada a few weeks ago where among other performances they had the F-18s Canada currently uses, the Eurofighter Typhoon that lost the bid to replace the Canadian F-18s, and the F-35 that won the bid to replace the F-18. It was raining that day but the F-18s and Typhoon still performed. The F-35, however, did not; it can’t fly in the rain because its paint will come off. I found that pretty hilarious in juxtaposition. “Thanks for the purchase! Here’s your upgrade that can only fly on nice days! Be sure to tell your enemies to not attack you when it’s raining!”
That's on the edge - but not out of - the realm of possibility.