this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2024
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How... do you go about getting diagnoses as an adult? I am 38 years old and relatively well adjusted, I think?. Career, home, family, degrees. But I always just thought I was just, idk, wierd, but I have learned to occasionally point my hyperfixation in a constructive direction. It is always fixated somewhere, getting through school, my job, but whatever I am fixated on, it is the only thing that matters in the whole world. I graduated at the top of my class with a 4.0 and all the awards and accolades possible. I am a high level supervisor at my work, etc. Like, I am doing OK, but other times I will get distracted, and for a month my fixation will be a video game, or my fish tank and my work will suffer. Once I lose interest I would rather put my head through a fucking wall than deal with the details of something I no longer care about. Even if other people depend on me to finish something it is pulling teeth for me to finish it. All it gets is a superficial level of attention. None of the passion. My life is a series of rabbit holes and half finished projects. For me I am fine, but the people around me that get neglected when I am on to something else.... if I am focused on my job, it consumes me, every waking second I am either at work, talking about work, working on stuff for work, getting another certification for work, and I am terrified if I try to refocus to try to maintain some sort of work life balance I will lose any reasonable interest in work and everything I have done will be for nothing.
Writing it out I feel far less "adjusted" than I thought... my wife has pointed it out for years how it actually affects me, (and her, and the kids) more than I realize. Sometimes I get in the threads in this sub and I have a "Oh, shit..." moment where I realize so many of my own patters relate to the comments in here and wonder what life would be like if I actually took care of it. I was diagnosed when I was like 7 but it was never followed through with or treated. IDK. ๐คทโโ๏ธ
Are you me?
My hobbies used to be collecting hobbies. CBT helped me realize that, and now I know when to pull back before I jump 10000% into a flavor of the month. I still get interested in things, but I give myself a 72-hour cooldown before purchasing anything new for a hobby. If I'm still interested after that, I dip my toes in. I more often than not realize it's just a fixation and save myself a ton of time and money that I can put towards my long-term goals.
If you feel you might have adhd you would want to start with getting a diagnosis. Usually, through a psychiatrist. From there, they can work on a treatment plan.
So can I start with something a little milder or do I need to jump straight in to CBT? I guess I was expecting to ease into things with maybe some light spanking or candle wax.
Don't neglect the balls.
I finally asked my wife to find someone to discuss it with. Scheduling appointments is so difficult for me, let alone finding who I'm supposed to see, whether that's a vet, a doctor, or a mechanic. I imagine you can Google (or duckduckgo) "Adhd doctor near me" or something
Anyway, I only take meds on the days that I need to be productive, but same story. On those days it feels like I snuck a cheat sheet into a test. The same kind of "this is just how most people live? You can just get shit done?"
I basically talked to my regular doctor about it and he asked me a few questions before agreeing that I have ADHD and prescribing me meds. I didn't realize that was uncommon until I mentioned it too someone else though.