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The solution is so simple to me. Please explain why we can't just have gender neutral bathrooms with actually private stalls/changing rooms and just a shared handwashing area?
Because none of this is actually about bathroom privacy. It's about an excuse to hate and fear the other.
Bathroom bills don't even seem like they increase bathroom privacy. The only passable justification (which still relies on demonstrably false assumptions and in fact completely backfires in practice) is to "protect women" from "predators".
In reality, trans people are less likely to be predators than cis, and bathroom bills primarily serve to increase the number of cis people being accosted in bathrooms because they don't look "normal" enough. So it's still completely unjustifiably stupid. But it's the only justification that even makes any sense at the outset even when you believe the fear mongering lies.
Because that costs more to install per toilet.
Money is why you cannot have privacy, safety, or a better experience.